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Am I doing something wrong?

4 answers
3 years ago
Ever since my boyfriend found out that im pregant, hes doesnt even act like I am at all, you think he would like hold my tummy, i had to ask him to for the first time the other day only cause it feels better when soeone holds it, its was hurting ;pp haha, but like when do those "bitchy hormones" kick in idk if I'v gotten them, I just gettt annoyed easy, and ever since he found out hes been nothing but mean to me and hes yells at me for soemthing small, its like I don't knwo what to do. We just got into a fight, and I got sick as a dog and it killed my stomache, I don't wanna be stressed otu for the baby , but its gettting out of hand I don't know what to do anymore. Should I leave him, maybe that would make him more happy, and if I talked to him bout it, all he would do is yell. & another thing when we talk like serious hes the one rasing his voice at me when i'm just tlaking in a normal tone, its getting weird like he never acts this way. Idk. Maybe its just me.

answers (4)

3 years ago
aww hun first off I am sorry to hear that you are having to deal with this. Is it your first baby? Maybe he is just stressed as well.. my boyfriend and I are now expecting our second baby but when we were getting used to the idea of the first baby he was far from being the nicest person.. really got mad and snapped at me over the littlest things and it turned out that he was worried about the things that come with being a parent.. like the cost, being able to be a good dad those kinds of things.. I eventually had to get him to talk about it and it was in the middle of one of our fights where he was yelling and screaming that I finally yelled back and got him to explain..how far along are you though? I understand the stressing you out and getting sick I did this alot and its not good on you or the baby.. make sure that you put you and your child first and if you have to maybe leave for a few days and stay with family or friends and he will see what hes missing.. I hope things work out for you and this is of atleast some help.. I have been there and can honestly tell you there is not a quick or easy solution =(
3 years ago
I am going through something similar myself. Except I am not with the father of my baby now.  He is still my best friend and I love him dearly.  I hope that he will be a willing father figure and in our lives in someway but he was not expecting to be a father right now.  It is a huge step, and for guys it isn't real right away.  Even with the girls going through the vomiting, and mood swings, the food aversions, those horrible craps from tubal ligament stretching and everything else our bodies go through the guy really hasn't felt anything yet.  I know it is hard, you want him there rubbing your back and holding back your hair, but it is possible that he isn't ready for that aspect of life yet.  Adding stress on to you isn't good.  If you have somewhere you could go for a few days that could help.  You should also talk to someone about it, not a friend because they are too close to your situation.  Talk to a mentor or a counselor, I have an awesome Baby Love nurse at the health department who will listen to me.  She has also offered to set me up with counseling sessions to make sure that I am coping with all the changes in my life.  If its possible maybe you should look into that program or something similar near you.  There are a lot of resources and support structures out there for you when your are pregnant, don't be afraid to tap into them.
3 years ago
I think he is stressed out as welll, but I wish guys had a bettter way of showing it not by yelling cause hes has like idk if they're put as anger issues but he flipps easy and will like freakout, but I learned to deal with that. Its almost like takking care of a baby already ;p hehehe. And yes this is my first baby, and i'm only a couple months i'm going to the doctors to tell how far a long I am, and then ill let you know for shuer. & I think another thing something has to do with it is, his sister is 25 and just had her baby and she thinks she knows everything, and shes been trying to talk him into letting the baby go up for addoption? Like its not only his baby, and I want to keep it, I wanna take responsiblity for him/her. I don't know. But i'll deff try to tlak to him about it, for sure. & the nurse's , i'v been trying to find one for me, so I have my mom looking into more thing on that as well. But thankyou for the help (;
3 years ago
We have to understand that our men (just like us) need time to adjust to the news.  Whether you were trying to get pregnant or not, everyone in the family needs time to adjust to their new roles (grandparents, aunts, uncles, and mom & dad to be).  Give him some time...if you're not showing just yet or he can't feel it, its going to be harder for him to conceptualize.  I've had this talk with my DH a lot just to make sure that he feels envolved in the process.  I'm not showing much but he is trying to bond with the baby (he kisses my belly in the mornings now).  We have to remember that this is happening to our bodies...not theirs.  They have a lot of feelings about the pregnancy and the lack of involvement they can have.

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