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baby shower drama

Relationships

baby shower drama

My sister in law has started to plan my baby shower and it makes my sister mad becuase she cant do it but i really dont want my sister to do it because she never talks to me or even ask me how im doing or anything and so now she has the whole family getting mad at me cuz im letting my sister in law do it instead. i told her she can do games and decorations and help my sister in law and even gave her my sister in laws number so she can call and ask if she needs help but she wont call her but everyday she sends me mean txt messages and tells me im a bad sister. im tired of being in her shadow and never getting a chance to shine and be myself. but now that im pregnant its become worse cuz everyone talks about me and not her. it hurts so bad and iv told her but she doesnt listen and im afriad some of my family wont come to the baby shower( its at the end of january) cuz of her.
asked by JESS_ROSSON 2 years 27 weeks ago
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answers (4)
by mklogan submitted 2 years 27 weeks

Is there always that one person who tries to take away from your special day? Your sister is making the shower about herself. This is what I would do- Tell your sister that she can organize a shower for your family (with your sis-in-law organizing one for your sig other's family). Your sister will tell you she's not going to organize another shower, especially since you are doing it just to appease her. Now when people tell you you are being a bad sister, tell them you gave your sister the opportunity to throw a shower, and that's that.

One last thing- the way to get her to stop texting you would be to show her that you don't care- it sounds like she's an attn seeker and she'll get it any way she can, including having you apologize or feel bad for having or s-i-l throw you a shower.

Hope this helps!

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by lissiemel submitted 2 years 27 weeks

I think the above poster is right.  There's always one person trying to steal your day, especially with siblings.  Have you tried to ask your sister in law to call your sister and try to arrange to do it together?  Maybe if she calls her, then it takes you out of it.  And really you aren't supposed to be involved in the shower planning anyway.  I would tell your sister that she's stressing you out and therefore being a bad sister by putting unnecessary pressures on you while you are pregnant.  Stress on mommy= stress on baby= Not Good!  Tell her if she doesn't want to call your sister in law that's fine, but to either plan something herself or leave you out of it.  You have bigger things to worry about like growing a baby.  Hope it gets better soon!  :)

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by Supermomma submitted 2 years 27 weeks

Well, girl looks like you have a case of the jealous sister. I can relate. My SIL, gah the girl is like a big moutain of craziness. Anything I do she goes and does and I mean anything. I got pregnant and she was right behind me having one too. I had no opportunity to be showered with gifts of love and gratitude and happiness. She had a girl and she was infuriated because, she ran off and got pregnant again to try and have a boy.

 

So my solution is to ignore it. explain to your sister that you are trying to make your inlaws feel important. Tell her you love her and you will always love her and that it's very important to you that she respect your wishes. That she is an aunt now and that when she has her baby one day she will know where you are coming from. Being a mother is stressful and so many people are excited but, don't really understand or they forget what it's like to carry a baby. I had people fighting about who would be in the delivery room and finally I looked at the nurse and said. I don't care just give me a c'section so I don't have to decided. I hope things get better!

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by MrsCastaneda submitted 2 years 27 weeks

Put her in a "time out".  Don't bother responding to her text messages, don't even read them, just delete them.  She's being a first class bitch, and you have better things to do during your day than to put up with it.  Don't even talk to her.  She will either get the message and stop acting like a self absorbed snot or not.  If not, then there is no reason to take her off of "time out".  And if she sends people to you trying to make you feel bad, put them on "time out" too.

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