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Happy without the father.....

3 answers
4 years ago
I got knocked up within 4 months of meeting the father of my baby after not seeing each other for 7 years. Things started out great, the honeymoon phase I suppose, and now I have been staying with my best friend for a few weeks and I am much happier and can't explain why. The father and I still keep in touch, we go ut to eat sometimes and he is aware of all dr appointments. I feel like we are going to see things differently in how we raise this baby and its just going to make things more difficult. The other problem I am struggling with, is my family is on the other side of the country and I really want them to be apart of this, since its the first grandbaby. How do I talk to the father about my plans to want to go see my family and keep him in the loop on what is going on with his kid? Also (sorry) he continues to blame me for his drinking because I am not around so he claims he has nothing better to do!!! He doesn't work, I work 2 jobs and it's my fault for not being around and him drinking??? It's so frustrating. I don't want to hurt peoples feelings in this but I want to be with my family too. My parents think that it would be best if I moved home because I would have stability and people to rely on. Please give honest opinions. I need calrity and can't seem to find it.

answers (3)

4 years ago
Noone can give you the exact answers that you are looking for sweetie.. I do think that you need people there to rely on.. and if that means moving to where your family is then that probably is whats best for you and your child. If you honestly are happier without the babys dad and he isnt exactly supportive by sitting there drinking and nothing else then do whatever you think you need to. but I am glad that you dont fall into it being your fault that he is drinking you seem to have your life together and the daddy.. not so much.. but if you move keep in mind that depending on if you can transfer your jobs to where your family lives you may not be employed either which will add stress.. a newborn takes alot of work though and dont take it lightly if you dont tihnk you will have support around you where you are now.. good luck sweetie =)
4 years ago
Thank you so much! I agree with you. Just tonight I wanted to go see him and he had a group of people over! I was kinda bummed but its a friday what else would I expect? He constantly tells me that his house is my house but it doesn't feel like a home at all. It was introduced to me as the "chill spot" and that is what it feels like months later, not anyplace for a kid to be raised no matter how much you try. Thats just what I think anyway, but I thank you from the bottom of my heart for your honesty and perspective. Hopefully I can get the gumption to go home with my family. Take care dear!!
3 years ago
do you love him? Answer that honestly within then you can move forward. I would not be with him just bc  you are having a baby but the child does deserve healthy relationship( romantic or friendship) between the parents so which can both of you best provide?

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