I have 3 1/2 year old twins who we have been trying to potty train for over a year. At first we started really low key, just encouraging to sit on the potty before bath and whenever they seemed interested. They never had any success and never seemed very motivated to learn. After they turned 3 we decided it was time to try harder. We tried the 3-day potty training method and my son turned into such a whiny miserable mess that we stopped and went back to diapers for a short time. Then, my daughter showed some interest and was actually asking to put undies on, so we went with it. We had 2 good days where she had successes while sitting on the potty during mommy prompted visits to the bathroom. Then, on the 3rd day, she literally sat on the potty all day without going. She kept saying she couldn't and grabbing herself like she was trying to stop herself from going. So, after that I decided that we would have a time limit on how long we sat. Since then, she has not gone on the potty once. She was staying dry all day, holding for her pull-up at nap, so we kept undies on her at nap thinking she would eventually go. No, she just started holding all day long!
The other night she started freaking out because she had to pee and was in the tub. She refused to sit on the potty, refused to pee in the tub. She tells me she's scared to pee. I don't get it! I tried to explain to her that it feels better if she doesn't hold for so long. She doesn't seem to care about her sticker chart or any incentives. She will just hold until either she can't any longer and she pees on herself, or until her bedtime pull-up is put on. Yesterday she told me she would sit on the potty if we went and got her a new chair that was "not scary". We went today and I dropped $25 on another potty chair, she sat on it for an hour today with no pee, and then refused to sit on it again.
They don't go to daycare but I am afraid if I don't get them trained they are not going to be allowed to go to preschool next year. My husband and I are so stressed and arguing because of this. We both feel like parenting failures and don't know what to do!