Hey Im carly, I am 13 I have a question that I can't ask my parents

A. You should definitley wait to have sex. In all honesty, you're just too young and you probably aren't prepared to deal with the "consequences" of having sex, which range from pregnancy and STDs to regret. Plus, as cheesy as it sounds, you really should wait until you're with someone you really care about and who cares about you. At 13 any relationship you're in isn't based on true love, respect or compatibility, it's just based on who you think is cute and who you kind of like.

I lost my virginity at 19 to a guy I thought was cute but didn't really even know. I figured I was old enough and that I couldn't or shouldn't be a virgin forever, so what was I waiting for? Was it a mistake? Yes. No, I didn't get pregnant, I didn't get an STD and it wasn't terrible. (But it wasn't good either.) But looking back I wish I'd waited longer, until I was in a relationship with someone I really cared about. That first time wasn't special, it just was. And it turns out it was a bigger deal to me than I'd thought at the time, especially now that I'm married. Sex isn't just sex, it's an expression of love, an amazing way of connecting on a deeper level with someone you truly love and who loves you just as much. And that kind of love doesn't find you in middle school or even high school. 

As far as wanting to touch yourself goes, don't feel bad about it. It's completely normal to have those feelings and it's completely normal to act on them. You're going through a lot of changes right now and your hormones are going crazy. At some point you're going to have to do something to release the mental and hormonal pressure that's building up inside of you. So go ahead and touch yourself. Most girls start doing it around your age and I can pretty much guarantee you that all adult women do it. It's nothing to be ashamed of and you shouldn't feel weird about it. And, once you start you may find that the dreams stop.