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I have a big problem

Relationships

I have a big problem

Me and my husband are in the middle of working things out, He cheated on me with an ex friend of mine. I really do love him,and it would be best to try to work things out for the kids. Lately he has been acting so rude towards me, he belittles me in front of everyone and trys to embarrass me. Just to give you an idea, last night we went to his family house for supper. It was fun and the kids had a wonderful time playing with his neices. When we were at the dinner table I wrech over to get the brussel sprouts and he blocked it with his arm and said "easy there water buffalo" I look at him angrily and he was like "you know brussel sprouts give you explosive diarrhea" I got up and started to get the kids shoes on and he was like "bitch, don't even act like your gonna leave me, I will take the kids" I am really worried that he may hurt me or the babies I tried to leave one day but when I was leaving he got home and seen me and he took the kids into the house and then told me to get my my bags into the house
asked by Sweetmommaof6 38 weeks 4 days ago
answer this question
answers (8)
by VforVenture submitted 38 weeks 4 days

This is scary behavior and it will only get worse. He either needs to get into some therapy, which I doubt he'd be willing to do, or you need to get out. You should not tolerate that kind of behavior. If you do, what kind of example will you be setting for your children? Your boys will grow up thinking that is how women should be treated, and your girls will grow up thinking the same. You do not want your children to become abusers or victims. It's rare for me to advise someone to get out of a long-term relationship, especially when there are kids involved. But, this is a different situation. He is already verbally and emotionally abusing you. It won't be long until the abuse becomes physical. You need to do what you have to in order to keep yourself and your children safe.

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by Sweetmommaof6 submitted 38 weeks 3 days

I agree, I just don't know how this happend. We were happy and everything was fine untill like 2 weeks ago.

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by VforVenture submitted 38 weeks 3 days

If he's willing to see a therapist, that might help. But if he isn't, I doubt things will get better. And if that's the case, you should talk to a lawyer about your options regarding custody, etc.My husband has occasional anger issues because of his PTSD. But, he never talks to me like that. He is never intentionally hurtful or demeaning. He never threatens. And, he is working on his problems. If he was behaving like your husband, we would definitely separate until he got things under control. And if he didn't, we'd be done. There's just no reason anyone should have to live with that kind of treatment.

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by Sweetmommaof6 submitted 38 weeks 2 days

I noticed some crazy behavior before the babies were born, I just never had the guts to mention it to anyone and admit to myself that it wasn't gonna work out, I think the only reason I am trying to know is because of the kids! I have tried to talk to him about it but he doesn't wanna fix it, he doesn't see anything wrong with how he treats me. To be honest he has never been nice to me, and I think the only reason we got married is because I hated my situation and wanted a way out of it. I have suggested counseling but he just tells me that there is nothing wrong with our relationship! I think a divorce would be best, he hit me when I tried to talk to him about threapy.

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by VforVenture submitted 38 weeks 2 days

You definitely need out. I'm sorry you have to deal with all of this, I'm sure it can't be easy. Talk to a lawyer. You'll need a good one. Find out what kind of evidence you may need in order to get full custody. And, if your husband ever hits you, call the police and defintiely press charges.

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by Sweetmommaof6 submitted 38 weeks 12 hours

Right after he hit me I called my mom and she came to get the kids and take them to her house and I called the police, when they got there they said that I cannot press charges if I can't prove he assulted me. Which means untill I have a bruise,cut,broken bones or some evidence they can't let me press charges. It is completely stupid of them, and I actually have a lawyer which is trying to get things fixed but untill then  the babies and I are staying at my parents house.

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