Close

Member Login

Logging In
Invalid username or password.

not a member? sign-up now!

Customize Parenting.com to your family and get personalized newsletters.

answers

I want to have a 3rd child but he doesn't. What do I do?

I want to have a 3rd child but he doesn't. What do I do?

I would like to have a 3rd child but my husband doesn't. I am trying to let go of the idea of having another baby but having a hard time doing so. How can I convince myself to be happy with my family as it is right now? I have 2 great kids and an awesome husband. Please help!!
asked by bjjernigan01 1 year 38 weeks ago
answers (1)

I know exactly how you feel and it's a terrible situation to be in. When my husband and I got married (I was already pregnant with our first) we had decided we wanted our kids 18-24 months apart and that we wanted four kids. After having a girl and a boy we both decided we were done. Until about three weeks after our son was born and I knew I had to have more! We compromised on three pregnancies with the understanding that I would do whatever I felt was necessary to try to have four kids. I'm pregnant for the third time and we're only having one. The day of my big ultrasound was completely devastating because I felt I was never going to have the family I wanted. After some discussion we decided that we wouldn't make any decisions about a fourth baby until we saw how things went with three. I'm a stay at home mom so I know In eed to be able to handle three without pulling my hair out before I can think about more, and we need to make sure our budget can accomodate more kids easily. So for me, things worked themselves out and I'm confident that I'll be happy with whatever we decide later on.

My only real suggestion is that you talk to your husband. Let him know just how important a bigger family is to you and find out all of his reasons for not wanting more kids. Do you have opposite gender kids, or are they the same? (I know my husband is worried about having three girls and only one boy.) If you have a boy and a girl he may feel that your family is perfect and complete just the way it is. If you have two of the same gender maybe he's concerned about having more of the same. Or, it could be that your husband feels that two kids is really all that he can handle. Maybe the idea of more scares him and stresses him out. Whatever the case may be, you need to talk to him so that you can both come to a decision that makes you both happy.

Post Your Answer

All submitted answers are subject to the rules set forth in our Privacy Policy and Terms of Use

Super-Fast Breakfasts for Crazy Mornings

Fruit milkshakes, easy quesadillas, and more tasty eats you whip up in no time