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Problems with pregnant family member... Help

6 answers
3 years ago
My cousin, bless her soul, has always been the center of attention in the family. Whether we wanted it to be or not. I'm sure everyone has someone like that in their family. When I found out I was pregnant I called my mom and told her. It was a little shocking for her since I am only 20 and a week prior I called to tell her I was engaged, but none the less she was excited and started telling family. Two weeks later my cousin called everyone to announce she was pregnant and of course was a few weeks ahead of me in her pregnancy. Now she been calling me telling me what names I can or cannot use for my child or how stupid I am because I don't want any meds during my delivery. She says I'm not feeding my baby right because I'm not showing yet. Then she had the audacity to tell me how pathetic it is to get pregnant just to get a guy to marry me and how stupid I am to throw my life away by having a kid so young. I'm not going to lie I have a very short temper when it comes to people like her. Her mother says she's "delicate" right now and not to stress her out but I can only bit my tongue for so long. How do I handle this? Please help.

answers (6)

3 years ago
Wow I was in the same situation with my cousin and she had never even been pregnant or had a baby. When I was pregnant she would give me hell and say im an idiot because I wouldnt drink soda because it had caffine. Once I had my son I would hold him upright In my arms supporting his head and she would always get loud and be like omg your going to break his spine dont you listen to the doctors and try to take him away from me. After reseacrh and asking the pediatrician everything I was doing was exactly what I was supposed to, which I already knew but just wantd to confirm. But If I were you I would just laugh it off and not even give her the time of day. About the whole not wanting meds during delivery thats ridiculous how she could say your stupid for you to be putting your baby first and not having to give your baby drugs. Obviously thats pure jealousy. Just wait till your baby starts doing everything before hers and you can just laugh in her face.
3 years ago
same here, but it was a close friend. i dont think she even realized that some of the things she said/did were ridiculous.  when i announced being pregnant with my second child, she called me the next day saying she thinks she is pregnant (and she was NOT yet, but i guess trying) and made rude comments about my older son not being potty trained yet - he was only 2!  your aunt is correct, people do act bizzare when they realize they are not the center of attention, but that doesn't make it right! i know it is hard, but kill her with kindness.  ignore her inappropriate comments and what i did was ignore my friend all together. i figure if she was a true friend or really happy for me, like i was for her, then i wouldn't be dealing with it at all. for you its a relative, so if it does come to blows, i would try to explain that you are too happy with my own pregnancy to acknowledge the negative comments and although no one is perfect, including her, you are doing the best you can and are happy regardless of what she thinks or says. good luck and congrats to you!
3 years ago
Try not to put too much stress on yourself. You could always drive her nuts by calling her often asking for her opinion (but not necessarily taking her advice) just so it makes her back off a bit.
2 years ago
That is horrible! There is enough stress and hormones and questions we all have with a new pregnancy and even more so when the baby comes as a new mom. She will always compare her baby to your baby (hopefully they will not be the same gender). That is just horrible! I have no advice at all because that is ridiculous...she should be happy to have someone for her baby to be able to play with growing up. I am the youngest grandchild and all my cousins and siblings have children who are already in the double digits and am currently 22 weeks pregnant and I constantly think about how my baby will not have the close-knit friendships I have with my cousins and siblings. Good luck!!!
2 years ago
That is horrible! There is enough stress and hormones and questions we all have with a new pregnancy and even more so when the baby comes as a new mom. She will always compare her baby to your baby (hopefully they will not be the same gender). That is just horrible! I have no advice at all because that is ridiculous...she should be happy to have someone for her baby to be able to play with growing up. I am the youngest grandchild and all my cousins and siblings have children who are already in the double digits and am currently 22 weeks pregnant and I constantly think about how my baby will not have the close-knit friendships I have with my cousins and siblings. Good luck!!!
2 years ago
That is horrible! There is enough stress and hormones and questions we all have with a new pregnancy and even more so when the baby comes as a new mom. She will always compare her baby to your baby (hopefully they will not be the same gender). That is just horrible! I have no advice at all because that is ridiculous...she should be happy to have someone for her baby to be able to play with growing up. I am the youngest grandchild and all my cousins and siblings have children who are already in the double digits and am currently 22 weeks pregnant and I constantly think about how my baby will not have the close-knit friendships I have with my cousins and siblings. Good luck!!!

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