You are here

Get Answers

Sometimes it's nice to get advice from experts with a lot of letter degrees behind their names, but other times, you just need to hear what another parent (with a M.O.M. behind her name) has done that has worked. You've got questions? These moms have answers.
 
Ask a Question

You all keep saying this is normal...

7 answers
3 years ago
Thank you for all the responses, but I still dont think that you guys really get whats going on. He DOES NOT treat me like a princess. He DOES NOT accomidate my needs. He DOES NOT care that Im in pain or depressed. He DOES NOT care that the things he does are hurtful and mean. He says its just hormones, GET OVER IT. Fine. I am hormonal. Im pregnant. But is it wrong for me to want to be treated like a human being? So im moody, should he NOT try to be more sensitive? So Im fat, should he NOT tell me that Im beatiful instead of calling me 'big belly bertha' ? So he doesnt find me attractive anymore, should he NOT talk to me about it instead of shutting me out, looking at porn, and taking care of it himself? Am I crazy here????? I quit my job, moved across the state, and stay home and take care of him... This was all his doing! I did not want to leave my job. I did not want to move so far away from everything I know. I gave up everything I had, everyone I had, to be with him... and it feels like such a wasted effort. Seriously. Tell me Im wrong.

answers (7)

3 years ago
ur not wrong u are right..u may be hormal but we all were/are..ur having his baby and he should appreciate that..i understand what ur saying..he doesnt need to always need to be perfect because basically men are stupid but he should tell u that u are beautiful and try to cheer u up when ur in a bad mood..it took alot for u to move so far away for him and clearly he doesnt get that.. honestly i would not put up with him..and u have to think about ur baby too..is he going to be so negative wih the baby around? i hope it gets better for u!
3 years ago
At the end of the day, we're just people reading the internet.  We don't know your entire story, or your background, or really anything but what we see on the screen.  And we give advice based on what we're reading.  You know all those people who post "Am I pregnant?"  You know what we say?  "We don't know, no one on the internet is going to be able to answer you with any certainty.  Talk to your doctor." So I say to you:  "We don't know why your husband/boyfriend is treating you this way.  No one on the internet is going to be able to answer you with any certainty.  Talk to your doctor." Or your mother.  Or your sister.  Or your girlfriends.  Or ANYONE who knows the two of you and has seen the two of you interact and knows MORE than what you're typing on the screen.  Because frankly, sweetie, I'm sure there's more to the story than what you're putting here - and I think even you can agree.  After all, there was more to the story than what you originally posted, and we responded to what we read. One last thing.  YOU quit your job.  YOU moved across the state. YOU stay home and take care of him. NONE OF THAT IS HIS DOING.  Did you grab you by the hair and force you at gunpoint?  (Because if he did - get out.  NOW.)  No, you made that decision, whether on your own or in conjunction with him.  So either find a way to live with it - or find a way to fix it. You don't deserve to be treated like shit.  Not by him - but most of all, not by yourself, either. 
3 years ago
He may just be fed up with you being hormonal. He may just act like that to deal with the situation. My hubby doesn't make me feel beautiful. My hubby doesn't touch me at night. So I make myself feel beautiful. I doll up for myself. I do things that make me happy. And I know things will be different after the baby is born. Because I know I will be less hormonal. Tired, yes but not as hormonal. And sex when I will be able to get it, should no longer hurt me. Look forward to the positive changes that are about to happen. Or just go hang out with the girls and leave him alone for a while.
3 years ago
He really should be more sensitive to you, especially when you're in such a fragile state. What Arizona said is right though, we don't know you or the whole story. He sounds pretty cruel, but obviouly there must be some things about him that you love otherwise you wouldn't still be with him right?I would talk to a friend and I think the two of you might want to go to counseling and and seek Jesus's help too. Obviously your relationship is in trouble, and I think you both can agree that you want your baby to be raised in a very loving, stable environment. He has not been very good to you, but that's why you really need to try and fix this before the baby comes. People say the way a man treats his mother is the way he'll treat his wife, which I've found is true. I don't know if he'll treat the baby the way he treats you, but if he does, it's unacceptable. Treating you this way is unacceptable as well. And seriously, all things are possible with God. Jesus loves you and he will help you, all you need to do is ask.
3 years ago
If your really that unhappy now imaging how unhappy your going to be once the baby is here and he is not helping and your sleep deprived and run down….maybe you should look at the situation and ask yourself if you really want to be there….and if not leave
3 years ago
your not wrong. To be honest he is just being a jerk to you. He just might be going through a rough time or maybe he is just joking with you. My boyfriend/baby daddy does that too. He makes fun of me because Im growing a belly and will get bigger as time goes on. He doesnt treat me like a princess either. But i guess not every guy is that guy thats going to drop everything at that second and do something even though it would be nice if he did. They dont realize that its so stressful to have to be carrying a human being in our stomachs for 9 months. they dont understand that we get our feelings hurt when they make fun of us. Maybe if they knew how it felt to carry a baby and be moody and eat alot and all that stuff then maybe they wont say things so hurtful to us and they will understand. just stay strong and tell him how you feel about what he is doing or saying. Hope that he will stop after you talk to him. and if not then just ignore it. he should change when the baby comes. but he shouldnt be stressing you out because you dont need it. just try to not let it get to you. i try. its hard but it will eventually work. Take care and good luck!! :)
2 years ago
Sounds to me like you want sympathy.  I too, am a woman and go through spurts of just being way too damn sensitive.  I try to keep in mind though where my reliance is.  Am I relying solely on my man to uplift and support me emotionally at all times?  If so, I personally am in way too deep and asking to be let down.  I dont know what your spiritual beliefs are, or if you believe in anything at all, but thats the ticket for me.  I need something greater than me to put everything on, not my man... else he will fail me because all humans do.  I would be careful of your justifyed anger.  Is your husband being a pig?  Probably.  But you made this decision.  Make up your own mind on what to do instead of looking for people to make the deicison for you.  If your unhappy, move on.  I can guaruntee you though the longer you stay posting stuff on parenting.com the more confussed and crazy you will feel. 

Vertical Tabs

*DISCLAIMER
Parenting.com's Answers are provided by members of our community. While your fellow moms and our editors have plenty of great advice to offer based on their experience, it is not a substitute for professional medical help. Always consult a medical professional when seeking medical advice. All submitted answers are subject to the rules set forth in our Privacy Policy and Terms of Use