By 4 months, most babies are ready to sleep four or five hours straight. But teaching yours how to do it can be tricky. Should you let her cry it out? Indulge her every whim? See which method is best for both of you.
The gist A consistent schedule plus verbal and physical reassurance help your baby learn to fall asleep (and fall back asleep) on his own.
Why it's right for you
Your baby eventually manages to settle down without much intervention from you.
You want the flexibility to soothe if you choose.
Your baby seems to like consistency.
How to pull it off Starting the same time every night, use a 20- to 30-minute bedtime routine -- a warm bath, a comforting story, dimmed lights, soft music -- to signal that it's time to settle down and go to sleep. When it's time for bed, put your baby in his crib while he's drowsy, and then leave him to fall asleep on his own. You can look in on him and soothe him with your voice if he's crying, but avoid picking him up. This will condition him to drift off on his own so that he'll eventually learn to fall back asleep when he awakens during the night. Until then, feel free to respond to his cries as you normally would at night (nursing, rocking, etc.).
"It can take up to a week for your baby to get it," says Jodi Mindell, Ph.D., associate director of the Sleep Center at The Children's Hospital of Philadelphia and author of Sleeping Through the Night: How Infants, Toddlers, and Their Parents Can Get a Good Night's Sleep. "But within two weeks of a baby's falling asleep easily at bedtime, he's likely to start sleeping through the night." After he's able to fall asleep on his own at bedtime and sleep through the night, you can start working on naps in the same way.
The Long Goodbye
The gist Gradually sitting farther and farther from your baby at bedtime slowly breaks her dependence on you.
Why it's right for you
Your baby takes awhile to adjust to change or tends to get more hysterical the longer she cries.
You can't bear to hear her crying.
You're ready for some time to yourself.
How to pull it off Put your baby in her crib while she's sleepy but still awake, and then sit in a chair next to her. If she fusses, gently pat her back or head, or offer verbal reassurance, such as "It's okay, Mommy's here."
"Respond to her cry, but pick her up only if she gets hysterical," says Kim West, author of The Sleep Lady's Good Night, Sleep Tight. Once she's calm but before she drifts off, put her down again and sit back in your chair. Leave the room only after she's asleep, and repeat these steps if she wakes up during the night. Perform this method consistently -- with your chair next to the baby's crib -- for the next three days at bedtime and during the night, as well as at naptime. On the fourth night, move your chair about halfway across your baby's room, and on the seventh night, sit in the doorway. Do this for three nights, and then sit in view in the hallway for three nights. In about 10 days, your baby may be sleeping through the night on her own.