7 Ways to Fix Rude Tween Behavior
Tips to deal with your child's attitude as she grows into a teenager
Reciprocate Respect It's essential that you remind your child that you're a person, too. "I've told my daughter that it hurts when she screams at me or says she hates me," says Susan North-Tanaka, a mom of three in Long Beach, CA. "I tell her, 'I don't hate you, but it really hurts me to hear you say that to me.'?"
At the same time, remember that respect is a two-way street-especially when you start to get caught up in an emotionally charged argument. "I do sometimes apologize, " says Wade. "If I start to speak to my daughter before she finishes her sentence, for example, I'll say I'm sorry. I realize she's looking to be treated with respect, too, and I have to hold my own feet to the fire."
Let Her Stew When a "discussion" between you and your tween leads to screaming or hysterics (on the part of your kid, of course!), step back and wait for things to calm down. Encouraging your child to take a break from a situation is a good way to defuse high emotions all around.
I'll stay calm and say, 'It seems like I can't talk to you right now, so go collect yourself and let's talk later,' " says Wade. "Sometimes she'll be crying so hard, she'll say, 'I can't calm down!' but a few minutes alone in her room always works. She's always in a better frame of mind when she comes out."