4. Your personality

Thinking about your own needs when deciding on a sleep strategy for your baby doesn't make you selfish. In fact, it can help you choose a plan you'll actually be able to stick to. If you're schedule-oriented, you may function best when you know your baby is going to fall asleep at a certain time. More laid-back? You might not mind following his lead. But remember, whatever your ideal routine, life with a child can throw it for a loop.

Hilary Locker Fussteig of New York City always used to stick to a tight schedule. But when she brought her son, Jake, home from the hospital, she realized his up-every-few-hours sleep pattern was going to put an end to her well-planned evenings. Now 15 months old, Jake sleeps through the night and follows a somewhat regular routine of dinner at 6:00, bathtime at 7:00, and bedtime at 8:00. But, of course, evenings don't always go so smoothly.

"Sometimes, bedtime doesn't come until 9 or 10 p.m.  -- and I find myself watching the clock and thinking, 'There goes that e-mail I have to send or those bills I need to pay,'" she says. "But I'm so much more relaxed than I used to be. Now I roll with the punches  -- and I think that's really helped Jake."

5. Your history

Issues from your past will also shape your views on getting your baby to sleep, says Sarah Swales, a sleep consultant in Oakland. A mom who feels she didn't get enough attention from her own parents as a child may feel strongly about comforting her baby when he cries at night. Moms who had fertility issues, difficult pregnancies, or preterm babies also may not want to let their infants cry, says Swales. Others may react to their own chaotic upbringing by making sure their children have a predictable sleep schedule early on.

Of course, many new moms have positive memories about their childhood or pregnancy, so these sorts of concerns don't play as much of a role. As long as feelings about your past don't keep you from creating a sleep environment that works for your baby now, go with what feels best.

6. How much help you have

While you and your partner may not totally agree on how to get your baby to sleep, you'll need each other's support  -- whether it's another set of arms when yours ache or a reassuring hand to squeeze when your child's wailing at night. But if you're worried that your current sleep methods are pulling you further apart instead of bringing you together, it's time to regroup.

Claire Lyle of Canton, Georgia, spent most evenings of her daughter's first year nursing and rocking her back to sleep. "Sometimes I'd have time to eat dinner and that was it," Lyle says. "There were nights when I wouldn't even see my husband. It put a strain on our relationship."

After months of his urging, she started putting Mia in her crib at bedtime while she was still awake. During the second night of listening to her wail, Lyle frantically flipped through one of her baby books, rereading a chapter that argued against letting babies cry it out. "I just broke down and said, 'I can't do it anymore,'" she says. Her husband persuaded her to try again a couple of nights later, and although Lyle was so worried that she barely slept, Mia was crying less and less.

"Now she's asleep in five minutes," Lyle says. "Mia's better off  -- and so are we."

What most moms have learned is this: There is no right way to get a baby to sleep. What works for one may not for the next, just as what feels comfortable to one parent feels all wrong to another. The key is figuring out which methods best suit you and your baby. And that's something, sleep-deprived as you may feel, that you can do. Sweet dreams.

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