Development
Developing Your Child's Memory
From the moment of birth, your baby's expanding ability to remember is an important part of his cognitive growth. Here, ways to help him make the most of this critical tool.
By Carolyn Hoyt, Parenting
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Ages 2 to 5

It's not only the ability to talk that jump-starts memory; it's also the ability to tell a story. The story form creates a context that makes something memorable. "The narrative form is the scaffolding and support for remembering," agrees Peter Ornstein, Ph.D., professor of psychology at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, and coeditor of Memory for Everyday and Emotional Events.

Preschoolers begin to remember specific events from their past  -- that is, "I remember the day I wore my red swimsuit to the beach and met my cousins there," rather than, "I remember the beach"  -- when they can construct a narrative about what happened. The building up of autobiographical memory starts here.

As preschoolers, children start remembering abstract concepts, such as colors, how to count to ten, and the ABC's. They store this information in their short-term memory, and then struggle to retrieve it when they need to. At some point, though, the retrieval process becomes instantaneous and the struggle disappears. They don't remember color names  -- they just automatically know them.

These abstract memories get transformed into knowledge when they're frequently retrieved, sort of like learning how to drive a stick-shift car. "When you start out, just remembering how to do it consumes all of your attention. All your energy is taken up," says Ornstein. "After a while, though, remembering that skill is smooth and effortless. The strategies you use to remember are deployed automatically." In this case, practice really does eventually make perfect.

A preschooler will naturally remember things of interest to her, like her sister's favorite  -- and forbidden  -- Barbie doll. When it comes to memorizing more complex things, her best memory tool is one that parents are all too familiar with: repetition. "We were in the car, and my mother-in-law was telling me a story about when my husband and his brother were children," says Judy Williams, of Middletown, CT. "My then 3½-year-old, Samantha, was listening in the backseat, and she made my mother-in-law tell the story as many as eight times. Then she told the story back to us, and remembered the whole thing."

When preschoolers demand you read a book to them again and again, they're unintentionally using the strategy of repetition so that they can learn it by heart. And if it's a book that's memorable  -- with rhymes, rhythm, good pictures, and cool characters  -- they will, in all likelihood, eventually regale you with the whole thing, verbatim. And don't try skipping words at bedtime. They'll catch you every time.

MEMORY BOOSTERS

Repetition, though it does store information, does nothing to actually improve memory capacity. But researchers have discovered that helping your child learn how to tell a story will enhance memory development. "When you talk about the past with a preschooler, it has long-term payoffs," Ornstein says. "She'll extract general principles about what she can remember about the past, and about how to remember."

To help a child tell her stories: Prompt her to elaborate on her experiences. Not the big things, like a trip to Walt Disney World, but everyday occurrences, like circle time or playtime.

Ask her a specific question, like, "Did you have Oreo cookies again for snack today?"

Keep the story going, and focus on your child's interests, not on your own. You might ask her, "Did you open up the Oreo and lick out the cream? Did your friend Dylan do that, too? I bet that was really funny, wasn't it?"

TRICKS THAT WORK

  • Reconstruct the past. If your 4-year-old lost his favorite action figure sometime before lunch, help him recount the story about when he and Batman started playing, what they did together, and whether the Batmobile sped under the couch or the piano.

  • Make up melodies and rhymes. Teach your child his phone number by setting it to music, and do the same with the spelling of his name. "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" works really well for phone numbers.

  • Use it and he won't lose it. This works for safety rules as well as colors and the ABC's. Integrate the concepts that you want him to remember into everyday routines. Have him identify letters of the alphabet in street signs or cereal boxes. Let him use the phone to call home by himself. Remind him to look both ways every single time you cross the street.


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