Relationships

Ask Denene: Making New Mom Friends

My family just moved. How do I fit in as the new Mom?

By Denene Millner, Parenting
 
See Also
You win some, you lose some, you grow closer to others. A guide for new moms - Parenting.com
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Truths they want you to know  -- that can save your friendships - Parenting.com
How can you help your child's friendships along? - Parenting.com
Tact and tactics to help your kids keep their buddies - Parenting.com
When my first child was born, I hosted my in-laws for three tiring days. How do I avoid a repeat of that? - Parenting.com

My family just moved, and I'd hoped to meet other moms at school, but they just say hi, then turn back to their friends. How do I break in?

There's nothing worse than feeling like an outsider in a group full of grown-ups; it wasn't cute when we were kids, and it's even worse as an adult because we figure we should all be bigger (read: more mature) than this. Chances are, though, these women aren't being catty; they're just getting in quick conversations with moms whom they've gotten close to over the years. Try not to take it personally. Instead, join 'em -- literally. When I moved from New Jersey to Georgia four years ago, I made new mom friends by parking the car, coming into the school, sitting on the lobby couch among a bunch of women who gathered there every day, and introducing myself. Soon enough, I was chipping in on PTA-sponsored events and volunteering as my daughter's third-grade class mom. The more I helped with school functions and classroom events, the more moms I worked with, and the better I got to know them. It wasn't an overnight thing, but I did eventually make some school-mom BFFs of my own, and even though some of our kids have parted ways or gone on to different schools, we keep in touch and enjoy each other's company whenever we can. So if you want to make new friends, don't stop at "hello." Get in the game and you may end up with more pals than you even want!

Ask Denene Millner your tricky parenting questions at Parenting.com/momsquad.



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