The other families in my child's school definitely have more money than we do. I'm embarrassed to invite their children over for playdates. Our house is so tiny! Is there any solution?

If the recent housing and credit crisis has taught us anything, it's that lots of folks are living in houses they can't afford. If you're not, that's great. But regardless of anyone else's situation, what really matters is that your home is a safe and fun place for kids to play, says Christie Mellor, a mom and author of The Three-Martini Playdate. Mellor speaks from experience: A preschool friend of her son's once exclaimed, "Your house is so small!" when she arrived for a playdate. "If this had come from an adult, it would have seemed aggressively rude," recalls Mellor. "But this was a five-year-old, so I said, 'Yeah, isn't it great? It's the most fun house and the absolute perfect size for us.' Which is true." Before long, the two kids were playing happily. The bottom line: Even children who live in sprawling mansions will quickly adjust to hanging out in a little bungalow when they've got friends, snacks, and some room to cut loose. "Don't ever be embarrassed by the size of your house," says Mellor. "Unless it really is a closet. And it's filled with sixty-two cats and your collection of rusted railroad spikes. Then you might want to meet at the park."

I feel like I have a lot in common with one of the moms from my kid's class, but our children don't particularly like each other. How can I get to know her better?

This is a common dilemma as kids get older: They have definite preferences in friends, and it's going to be increasingly rare that the mom you like actually has a likable kid of the same age and gender as yours. You're probably better off trying to arrange adults-only playdates when you can. Yes, it's a bit awkward to approach another mom without the comfortable cushion of your kids between you. So keep it casual. See if she can meet you for coffee after you drop the kids off at school, or an hour or so before school lets out, if your schedules allow. "If you need to bring the kids along sometime, consider an activity-based outing like a visit to the park or a session at a paint-your-own-pottery place," suggests Borba.

My second child has started school, and I'm totally becoming a slacker mom. I'm not volunteering in the classroom nearly as much as I did with my first. Am I scarring my child for life?

No way! As parents, we do many things differently (and less often) with our younger children, and they manage to survive, says Weingarten. And let's be real: Your child isn't tallying up your hours and comparing them to what you did for his older sibling. "However, if your child is begging you to volunteer in his class, see if you can do so once or twice. Kids feel very proud when their parents help out," Weingarten says. If you work full-time, ask the teacher if there's anything you can do at home. She probably always needs items cut out for the bulletin board. Explain to your child how you're helping, and invite him to assist you. Remember, though, that volunteering isn't just a pleasantry. "It's one way you learn about other families, meet your child's friends, and see how he behaves at school," says Weingarten. The good news, though, is that "slacker moms" can pick up a lot of that information just by hanging around for an extra ten minutes, chatting casually with other parents, and observing their kids with their friends and teachers. So give yourself a break: You're not really doing less -- you're just getting more efficient!

Teri Cettina is a mom of two in Portland, Oregon. She respectfully declines to divulge which of the above scenarios were inspired by her own experiences.

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