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Getting Over New-Mom Guilt
By Dina Roth Port, Babytalk
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Graceful ways to handle unsolicited parenting advice, even if it comes from your family - Parenting.com

You're not Martha Stewart

Kate Vasey of Rochester, New York, says she feels guilty when she hasn't cleaned the kitchen or the dust bunnies start to collect. "I tell myself that once my newborn is older, I'll have more time for household tasks. But then I order pizza for dinner again and the guilt comes rushing back."

It might seem very June Cleaver, but moms today still feel like they have to be quintessential homemakers, even when they have so many other responsibilities. Competition between moms also adds stress -- whether it's who brings the best dessert to the bake sale or whose child has the most creative art project. This pressure can be particularly great for stay-at-home moms because motherhood has become their new profession. "Our generation of women was brought up to believe that we could do anything and do it well -- so when we became wives and mothers, we applied that high-achieving standard to our new roles, which is impossible to maintain," says Amy Tiemann, Ph.D., founder of mojomom.com and the author of Mojo Mom: Nurturing Yourself While Raising a Family.

How to get over it: First, remember that your baby needs you more than your furniture needs polishing. "It's important that your home is a safe environment where your child can learn and explore. It doesn't have to be ready for the president to come visit," says Pflock. In other words, don't fret if toys are all over the floor. And ordering takeout only means more time for you to spend with your family.


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