Girl Talk: Working Mama
Q. I'm a working mom and lucky to have my baby in a great daycare center nearby. Recently, a friend commented that she'd "never let a stranger raise her child." It really hurt my feelings. Am I being too sensitive?
A. Assuming that your buddy doesn't make a habit of being a thoughtless clod, you should let her comment pass like the flatulence it is.
Having been a working mom and a stay-at-home (working-implied) mom, I have spouted both sides of the offensive coin, saying, "I could never have a nanny" or "I could never be cooped up at home." In both cases, however, I wasn't suggesting that another mom's decision was wrong for her, but affirming that mine was right for me. What can I say? Insecurity and bad manners go together like Oreos and milk.
If staying mum isn't your style, you might say something like, "I couldn't have a stranger do that either. That's why I'm so glad we found the Mary Poppins Daycare Center. Our daughter is so happy there." After that, you can expect a very satisfying "Oh, I didn't mean you" apology. If not, your friend is a thoughtless clod.