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How to Stop Helicopter Parenting

Learn how to raise independent kids and stop micromanaging their every move

By Deborah Skolnik

The Way We Whirrr

For the helicopter parent, these things really get their choppers going…

Trifling toy traumas

Little Thomas Parker has a train set, and sometimes the tracks jiggle apart. “I'll stand there and watch him trying to fix it for a minute, but I don't like to see him struggle. Before he reaches the breaking point, we step in,” his mom, Robin, confesses.

School snafus

Paranoid Parents author Christie Barnes heard of one mom who called school to complain that a kid had stared at her son. It turned out he'd stared because her son had drawn a flower on his nose.

Sticky Social Situations

“We took our three-year-old son, Jackson, to our friends' house for their kids' Halloween party,” says Chasity O'Steen. “Jackson didn't really know their kids, let alone their kids' friends. I kept wanting to walk across the room and help him enter the group.”

Clothes Calls

Hair and makeup artist Candice Isaac, of Baltimore, still selects her 4-year-old daughter Sierra's clothes. “Sierra would pick five options and stand there trying to choose, and I have to get out of the house to meet clients," she says.  

Surprise! Stuff Your Kid Can Do on His Own

So what is your kid capable of? These are all tasks he can start to learn as he moves past toddlerhood:

1. Zip his pants

2. Put on a belt

3. Make an easy sandwich, like cream cheese and jelly, using a dull knife. (Hint: Toast the bread, so it's a little easier to handle.)

4. Sort socks

5. Fold towels

6. Help set the table

7. Put clothes in the laundry basket

 

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