But the one place where we were both still unsure was on the topic of circumcision. Abbie and I didn’t yet know the sex of our child, but admitting that we were even questioning whether or not to circumcise our son set off a slew of opinions at the table that evening.
“You have to circumcise him!” said my sister Melanie, an emergency room doctor who has seen her fair share of infected uncircumcised penises and urinary tract infections, and whom I trust immensely.
My other sister, Meredith, an amazing mother of three boys who were all circumcised, agreed. “It’s unsanitary,” she said. “I can barely get my kids to brush their teeth at night. And imagine him in the locker room when he’s a teenager.”
Our best friend and sperm donor, Tim, who is circumcised, was more aligned with Abbie and me. He questioned, like me, if the procedure was outdated and based more on social customs than medical necessity. And, like Abbie, he wondered whether the benefits outweighed the trauma.
Health! Melanie reinforced. Hygiene! Meredith repeated. Is it really necessary? Tim asked honestly.
All of the impassioned arguments and questions raised during this discussion gave us plenty to consider. To be honest, as lesbians, neither Abbie nor I had spent a tremendous amount of time thinking about circumcision in the first place. But it was clear that as soon-to-be parents, we had a lot to learn.