The comedian, writer on E!'s Chelsea Lately, and mom of three takes us through an average day.
6:45a.m.: iPhone alarm goes off.
6:47: Give my 5-year-old a piggyback ride to breakfast.
7:00: Wake his two older siblings.
7:42: Look frantically for the 5-year-old's shoes.
7:44: Go out onto our front porch in my tank top and underwear, retrieve the shoes, and wave at elderly neighbor power-walking past my house.
8:30: Drop kids off at school.
8:37: Place toddler-size dummy into my son's car seat and merge into the carpool lane on the 405.
9:20: I arrive at work. Chelsea Handler makes fun of my Shape-Ups. I tell her it's the only exercise I get.
10:17: The writers and I decide to do a bit for the show about a pregnant stripper. I get cast as the pregnant stripper.
3:51p.m.: Take photo with Chuy Bravo and post it on my Twitter @HeatherMcDonald.
6:06: Start car.
6:31: Still not on the freeway, so I start calling single girlfriends. Thank God for Bluetooth.
7:04p.m.: Enter front door. I kiss all three kids, and tell them and my husband to please put their shoes in the shoe basket by the front door.
7:15: Eat spaghetti dinner with the family and find out that one of the kids no longer likes red sauce.
9:22: Press pause on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills to get the 5-year-old water.
10:36: Set iPhone alarm for 6:45 a.m.