Celebrity guest bloggers The Guncles, from Oxygen's reality show Tori & Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood and dads to toddler Simone, open up about their plans to add (or not) to their family. Read their earlier posts about how they chose open adoption, all about their birth experience in a small Southern town and the nail-biting moments before they could finally leave the hospital with their baby in their arms, and just who they’ll turn to when Simone has questions about “girl stuff.”
The old adage is right: Time flies by. It's hard to believe that our little Simone is about to turn 2 in a few weeks. How is that even possible? Fellow parents, you know what we're talking about. With a blink of an eye, our little baby has become this beautiful little girl. We're so proud of her. She can count to 20 (and to 10 in Spanish!) and can recite her ABC's from A to Z—all on her own. With a few more eye blinks, she'll be off to kindergarten. Time flies by. And speaking of time flying by, we keep wondering if it's time for us to start our journey to adopt again. Is two our magic number or are we meant to have just one child?
Since we adopted in the public eye and are talking a lot about adoption in interviews, people are always asking us if we'll have a second. We feel the love and know people (family, friends and fans) are rooting for us. We would ideally like for Simone to experience having a brother or sister, since neither of us have one. It's definitely a lot to think about! So many pros and cons run through our minds. We had such an amazing experience adopting Simone that we do have a fear of not having another great adoption experience. More or less, we think, Can we get lucky twice? Through our adoption mentoring service, Hold My Hand, we share advice with people, like us, who are making their dreams of becoming a family come true with adoption. Like any parent, we have fears. Can we handle two kids? We're already so busy with raising Simone... Can we raise another too? The truth is, it's scary.
For the past year, we’ve had Simone enrolled in a toddler program at school. It’s been one of the best decisions we’ve made. She’s learned so much and she (and we) have made amazing friends. As Simone gets older, we think a lot more about school life after preschool. Living in Los Angeles, many of our friends send their children to private schools. And in Los Angeles, school tuitions can run as much as $26,000 to $32,000 per year. That is mindboggling to us. If we have two children… How would we ever afford upwards of $60,000 per year of school tuitions?!!!! But then again, we think... We can't think of it as a strictly financial decision. Yes, the cost of living definitely has to be considered. And no, we can’t afford 60K per year flying out the door for grade school tuitions. We'll just have to find a neighborhood to move to with a well-rated public school system. We'll be fine. We'll make do. We keep telling ourselves that.
We know so many of you can relate to our same fears. Two children means more daycare, more school plays and sporting events. More of everything. Some folks tell us there's no difference between having one child and two. How can that be? At the end of the day (and with all fears aside), we dream of having another child.
Unlike conceiving a child the natural way, with adoption it's a whole new set of people. We'll have to start from scratch. All new brochures, websites, home inspections. At least this time though, we'll be familiar with the process! We feel so incredibly spoiled with our relationship with Simone's birthmother. As we mentioned in previous posts, she is an amazing woman. We can only hope that whomever we meet for our second child will be equally amazing. It'll be hard shoes to fill, that's for sure!!
We’ll share more about our (possible) journey to adoption #2… Soon!
-- The Guncles, Bill & Scout