I settled on 1/4 of a gnawed triangle of brie and a Coke, carrying them to the living room. After selecting "Star Trek" on the TiVo, I plopped down onto the couch to enjoy Quiet Time (it ceased being Nap Time long ago. For Grace, at least).

Thump thump thump thump.

The pounding of tiny feet came through the ceiling.

Last year, I wrote about an experience I had as an ignorant, childless young man. While standing in line at the drug store, I cringed as young mother talked with a friend while her kid called for her attention over and over and over again. "OH MY GOD WILL YOU JUST ANSWER THAT FREAKING KID?!?" I thought.

We had a great time, and I learned a lot while in The Sunshine State. Here is the complete list.

1. If the screaming child on the airplane isn't my own, I can listen to her for hours. Remember THAT plane ride? You know the one I mean. You were single and childless, and the shouting, snotting, red-faced scream machine sitting in the seat behind you was stomping on your very last nerve. With each bellow, you contemplated how you could get her out of the plane and plummeting towards the earth.

That kid was on my flight from Florida to Boston. She screamed like her pony tails were in a bear trap. Here's the amazing part: I didn't mind at all. In fact, I was so darn grateful that she wasn't one of my own, and I honestly was unmoved by her wailing. Now that's incredible.