How Do You Decompress?

It was a Hold Me Or Else kind of day with my sweet Molly. I was not allowed to put her down, walk away or look in another direction, HOW DARE I EVEN THINK ABOUT IT. She wasn't interested in eating, and if the drenched shirtfront is any indication, she's doing some serious teething. Even though I don't remember how that felt, I'm sure it's not pleasant, and I did my very best to drum up a little sympathy. But the list of things that were not accomplished today is long, oh so very long, and the items at the top include SHOWER, EAT and CLEAN THAT FRIGHTENING PIT YOU CALL A KITCHEN.

I finally forced some sweet potatoes down her throat and, for the very first time today, she is content to be somewhere other than my arms, namely, entranced in front of the television with her brother. At this point I feel like I should pay my television an hourly rate and pretend not to notice when it scarfs down all the snacks in the cupboards.

Phillip should be home in about fifteen minutes and you know what's going to happen then? We'll eat dinner. THRILLING. And then we'll wash up and put the kids down and then you know what's going to happen? I'm going to Target, where the world is clean and bright and howl-free, and where I don't have to carry anything except my completely unnecessary purchases.

We live dangerously close to the mall and I'm only a tiny bit embarrassed to say that the big urban shopping center is my decompression method of choice. It helps that there's always something I "need,” you know? Tonight I need tin foil, and maybe something to wear to a church fundraiser on Saturday. Don't mind if I look around!

I feel like I'm well into the swing of two kids, but just because it's normal and routine doesn't mean it's easy. More often than not I'm completely wiped by the time my husband gets home, even on days when my kids are angels. And the days they're not angels... let's just say I've realized it's better for everyone if I take my handful of opportunities to leave the house, alone and unencumbered. When things get hard, I'm the type who clams up and shuts down, because it's easier to do everything myself. A lot of times I CAN’T talk about my day when Phillip gets home because I haven't had time to THINK about it. (Hello fellow introverts! Do share your inner processing strategies!) But it's amazing what an hour wandering aimlessly through the mall can do for my willingness to, you know, deal.

And calm down, I'm not driving my family into debt with my retail therapy. It's just that the mall and my beloved big box store is nearby, it's full of distraction and an easy place to be without my kids. Sometimes I take bubble baths, sometimes I go for walks, sometimes I hide in bed with my laptop, but I still need my shopping centers, people. 50% off clearance rack here I come!

How much do you want to bet I come home with shoes? And by shoes I probably mean shoes for MOLLY.

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