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21 Things I Won’t Miss About Pregnancy

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32w, 0d. Don’t get me wrong: I’m delighted to be carrying this baby girl and thankful that my body can get and stay pregnant—I know that’s not something to be taken for granted. Nevertheless, here are the 21 things I won’t miss about pregnancy after the remaining eight weeks (gulp!) tick by.

  1. The exhaustion (although I know I’ve got more of it ahead of me with a newborn’s sleeping habits)
  2. Compression socks (I’ve got a shin-ful of rockin’ purple spider veins making it look like I tumbled down a flight of stairs hitting each and every step)
  3. Feeling compelled to weigh myself regularly (something I avoid doing normally)
  4. Peeing myself when I try to dash across the street
  5. Peeing myself when I laugh
  6. Peeing myself when I sneeze
  7. Peeing myself when I cough
  8. Feeling like my vagina is going to explode (seriously—the amped-up blood volume combined with the weight gain is a dangerous combo down there)
  9. Not drinking (I could really use a glass of wine at this point, but I’m still on medication for my blood pressure, so it’s not an option)
  10. Not indulging in delicious desserts (thank you, midwives’ reminders re: weight gain)
  11. The constipation (‘nuff said)
  12. Constant bloody noses (my tissues look like I borrowed them from the set of a horror film)
  13. Constant trips to the bathroom (even if I don’t always have to pee, it always feels like I need to, thanks to this baby sitting on my bladder)
  14. Getting kicked/punched in the bladder incessantly by tiny feet/hands
  15. The insomnia (3 am and I are very familiar with each other these days)
  16. Folks’ unsolicited opinions and commentary (ranging from assertions that I look big to I look small, given how far along I am, I must be having a boy from the way I’m carrying regardless of what my ultrasounds have shown, horror at my having a third baby, etc.)
  17. The extreme weepiness and mood swings
  18. Elastic waist pants
  19. Feeling like a science experiment (there’s just always something new and surprising happening with my body, despite my having been through this twice before)
  20. Doing Kegels like it’s my job
  21. Stressing about how/when the birth will happen (I’m looking forward to giving birth at home again—assuming I can keep my blood pressure under control—but the not knowing how it will all go down is hard for this Type-A mama)

I’m working on my list of what I will miss about pregnancy for my next post—especially since this is my very last baby—so no need to feel like I’m a pregnancy-hater. What were you delighted to be done with once you reached the end of your pregnancy? Leave a comment below!

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