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New Parents’ To-Do List Goes Viral

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When you have a baby, it can feel like you’re in your own little world, comprised of just you, your partner, and your perfect little progeny. But one Brooklyn couple seems to think they actually are the center of the universe, as evidence by an obnoxious "helpfuls" list they created for friends and family.

The list, which was leaked to Gawker, outlines very specific ways to help soothe the new parents' "body and soul," like: 

  • Drop off a big super greek salad with grilled chicken. We will dress it ourselves at home. Or, drop off frozen homemade food like lasagna we can reheat later. *Allergies/intolerances include: Soy anything (including tempeh and tofu), carrageenan, guar gum, gum acacia, xanthan gum, carob bean gum (anything with the word GUM in it), lentils — Please read labels. Many of these ingredients are in store bought food.
  • Come over at about 2 in the afternoon, hold the baby while I have a hot shower, put me to bed with the baby and then complete one or more household chores, such as:
    -fold laundry
    -scoop the litter box
    -take [our dog] for a well deserved walk or run around the neighborhood or park
    -clean the kitchen or the bathroom
    -vacuum
  • Come over at 10am, make me eggs, toast, and ½ a grapefruit. Clean my fridge and throw anything out that you doubt — don't ask me, just use your best judgment. Clean the kitchen stove and the kitchen floor.

  • Make a giant pot of vegetable soup in our kitchen and clean the kitchen completely afterwards. Then take a big garbage bag and empty every trash basket in the house. Reline the kitchen garbage can with a fresh bag.

We’re all for asking for and accepting help during those first few blurry weeks with baby. If friends ask, by all means, give them a task. But it’s not gracious to supply them with a Jennifer Lopez-style backstage rider. New parenthood is no excuse for being a jerk.

Plus: Secret Fears of New Parents

What do you think? Is it ok to tell friends and family exactly what you want, or this list over-the-top? Leave a comment.

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