The Least Sentimental Thing You'll Read About Pre-K Graduation

Alex graduated from preschool this morning and his class hosted a super-cute ceremony and celebration. I kept waiting to be overcome with those my-baby-is-so-grown-up emotions. Here's what I felt instead:

OMG, this is so adorable, I think I’m going to cry.

Here come the tears—why is this so emotional?

We’re over here, Al…can you see us, bud?!

Oh, wait, Alex is misbehaving, not gonna cry, want to crawl in a hole instead.

If only I could get his attention, I could give him the death stare and get him to stop poking that girl.

OMG, I am so embarrassed. I wonder what these other parents think of me.

Ugh, Nora is so heavy, why can’t Nick hold her?

This shirt is really ugly and looks maternity-ish, I wonder if people think I’m pregnant.

Gheesh, how much egg is still on Nora’s face?

Wait, Nick was supposed to tuck in Alex’s shirt. Oh well.

That little girl with the red hair is the cutest thing I have ever seen.

Ugh, I can’t believe kindergarten is only a half day—so lame.

Did I remember to put deodorant on? This place is freaking hot….

High school graduating class of 2025?! Holy $*@!&!

If Alex ever does drugs, I’ll kill him.

Maybe he acts so silly because he’s the youngest?

Really wish I hadn’t had that second glass of wine last night.

I love Randy Newman. Now I'm going to cry. 

How many photos are in this damn slide show?

OMG, was he this bad all year? Maybe I should have gotten better gifts for his teachers.

I was really thinking I was going to write about all these heartfelt emotions I had about Alex’s big day but the ants in his pants got in the way. Instead of wiping away tears, I was wiping away sweat, just praying to get through the ceremony without him saying anything inappropriate or interrupting the teachers or waving his flag in anyone else’s face. I’m hoping the day gets a little more sentimental and sweet, but we’ll see. Have your kids graduated? How did the day make you feel? TGIF is all I can say!