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I’m Living Vicariously Through My Pregnant Girlfriends

Sarah Preston Gorenstein

Do you think it’s strange that I like going to Baby’s ‘R’ Us? And helping my pregnant friends design their baby nurseries? I’ve been to Baby’s ‘R’ Us twice in the last few months, with two different pregnant friends: my “womb friend” Robin, who’s getting induced on Friday(!), and my cousin Ally, who’s due in July.

I spent all day Saturday registering for baby stuff with Ally, and we had the best time. I love passing on my baby knowledge. I love picking out which bottles to register for (Dr. Brown’s), baby monitors (Summer), Boppy pillows, baby bathtubs, diaper rash creams, jumpers, cribs, bedding, bibs, the works. We covered some serious ground on Saturday; this baby is going to have the most beautiful nursery and accessories.

I’m not sure if this is a healthy activity for someone going through infertility but, as I've mentioned before, it’s a guilty pleasure of mine. I love helping my friends pick out stuff for their babies, especially when it comes to strollers—City Mini all the way!—but I always end up thinking about my own not-yet-conceived child too, and fantasizing about his or her nursery.

What would I do differently the second time around? My husband always says that Preston’s nursery is “boring,” and not very “baby-ish,” but I still think it’s the most soothing room in the house (we didn’t know the sex and went with gray and yellow, which I love). But next time maybe I’d go bigger and bolder. If we are so blessed, this baby is going to get a freaking shrine in the house, and will live in a non-toxic plexiglass bubble. (Kidding.)

Is thinking this way healthy? Am I setting myself up for major disappointment? Perhaps. But it’s a nice diversion, and it makes me feel good to think this way, and especially to be a part of my friends’ first babies.

I also like thinking about Preston’s toddler room while I’m out shopping around, and planning what we’re going to do when he’s ready to move to a big-boy bed. I want to design a cool toddler room for him, and make it very special (and not boring!). It helps keep my mind on what’s really important right now, and that’s him.

Do you try to avoid places like Baby’s ‘R’ Us, or are you the go-to girl for baby showers and registries? Do you think I’m a glutton for punishment? I’ve also taken both of these friends to the baby boutique I registered at before Preston was born, that my friend Rachel owns—called Twinkle Twinkle Little One (look it up, her stuff is to die for!). I swear, I make up excuses to go there. If you’re not a baby person, going there would make you one—the stuff is that cute. She designs baby nurseries and works within any budget, big or small.

When I was pregnant, I used to go in just to hang out and chat with the girls who work there (I’d stay for hours; I even ordered in lunch with them once, they couldn't get rid of me!). Every time I go now it brings me back to the greatest time in my life—when Preston was born. 

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