He must be having a field day with me. This quote hits particularly close to home, for me and probably other women like me going through infertility or trying to conceive. Another unfortunate side effect of this process? You can’t help but fantasize about your unborn, not-yet-conceived child, and plan for your uncertain future.
If I had a hard time being around pregnant people, I wouldn’t have any friends left! Two of my best friends are pregnant right now, and I couldn't be happier for them. It's the next best thing to me being pregnant.
Depending on the size of the fertility clinic you go to, it can feel a bit like a baby factory, and you can feel a bit like a case number. As incredibly personal, emotional and foreign as this process is to you, it’s very routine to them.
As soon as I stopped all the meds, after my embryo transfer was canceled during my IVF cycle, AF came almost immediately (literally days later). But since this time I wasn’t expecting to be pregnant I didn’t see it as a sign of defeat—I saw it as a sign that I could start preparing my body for a frozen embryo transfer.
With our IVF cycle in September I produced 33 eggs, 14 of which fertilized to become “perfect quality” blastocysts, a.k.a. day-5 embryos. Think about that: I produced 33 follicles in a single month, when a woman normally produces ONE.
Preston’s only 2 ½ so he doesn’t totally grasp the idea of a “sibling” yet, but I’m pretty sure he wants one. He’s always been very social with other kids, and gets adorably excited when we get together with our friends’ kids or his beloved cousins. I know the inevitable question is coming...
The truth is: I have absolutely no idea sometimes. But I can tell you a few things I experienced along my journey that might help you decide whether or not this infertility road is the right path for you.
I’ll go first: I used to keep my pelvis tilted and my legs in the air after sex, thinking that it would actually help…ya know…keep his semen from spilling out. Sorry, there's just no delicate way of saying that.
And I won’t judge you for not wanting more kids. I’m going to make this short and sweet: Some people want more than one child, and some don’t. It’s a personal choice, and it has nothing to do with feeling incomplete.
Our decision to try IVF next wasn’t an easy one, but we decided to take the big leap because there are better success rates with IVF vs. IUI—based on my diagnosis and age, we were given about a 60 percent success rate.