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Sometimes it's nice to get advice from experts with a lot of letter degrees behind their names, but other times, you just need to hear what another parent (with a M.O.M. behind her name) has done that has worked. You've got questions? These moms have answers.


3 answers
i met my best friend thru my husband. He is the godfather of her son gabe. And when I got pregnant, she assumed that she would be the godmother of our son. But me and my husband have talked and thought about this and came up with a great decision, i think. 2 of our older friends,since highschool, have been together for 5 years and both love kids to death, great educations, and are going somewhere in the future, we still hangout and talk often!.. Although I love my best friend I feel this is the best decision. She already has a son that she has help by her parents and goes out almost every night. Thats not someone I would want my son with if something should ever happen.. Though we are sticking with our decision, every time I see her she brings it up and makes me feel like the worse person ever. I dont know what to say to her. any suggestions?

answers (3)

I understand where you are coming from. My soon to be sister in law has always told me that when she has a child with my brother in law, I would be the godmother. Since I got pregnant, I think she assumed that I would choose her as my child's godmother but it's not the case. I simply told her that it was a joint decision between my husband and I and had someone in mind for that role. I haven't told her who that person will be because I don't feel I should have the need to explain. If your friend cannot understand and respect your decision, then maybe she isn't a good friend after all.
My situation is a little different from the both of you. My bf and I fueded over my daughters godparents. While I was pregnant we decided that since we are old catholic's we would have 2 sets of god parents one of blood and one of water (family and friends). I have 4 sisters and he has 2 no brothers. So we decided she needs 2 strong men in her life and 2 strong women. One day we argued because he did not want the people I chose as god parents and then he misinterpreted what I said as if I did not want his sister to be a god parent either. So we just did not baptize her. I am still hurt by this. His sister has backed out of being her god mother. Hoenstly you both have someone who wants to be there for your child whether the person is not fit to take care of your child at this moment in time they might grow up and be capable of doing it. A godparent is someone who is there for you and your child with no question. It must be someone who is genuine and loyal.
I somewhat disagree with this, sry. But to me a godparent is someone who is capable of taking care of your child if something should happen to both the parents, and you know that they will be taken care of!  Why would you leave your child, your life, the most important thing in your life to someone who is not capable of doing so.  Sure they could grow up but could is the problem. I want to be sure! Plus I already know how my used to be bf is with her son and I can not see my child living that way. She goes out all the time with her friends sure its after he goes to bed but then isnt home til after he wakes up sometimes, also has school all the time and plus work she never has any time with him. That is y we picked our other friends who are almost done with schooling and have jobs and their relationship is amazing and we know they would be the best for our son. I am sry they backed out of being the godparent but maybe they are not fit to do so and they know they wouldnt be the best for your baby..

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