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I dont know what to do! =( please help

9 answers
SRY this is so long!!! but If you have any ideas/ suggestions would be GREAT! thanks! So on tuesday my boss tell me that the dad does not want me to bring my baby with me to work =( It really upset me (I am a nanny, and work long hrs!) Said they would give me a final answer today.. Dad is now gone to work wont be back for 60 days.. So the mom will talk to me tonight! hey didnt want me to bring him because they had another nanny who had a son and he was bad or something. But this is what I had asked them to consider if they do not want me to bring him. 1-I was going to come back to work when he was 4 weeks but if i have to put him in daycare then they will have to give me another 2 weeks off cause infants can not start til 6 weeks old 2-daycares close at 6 so i would have to leave by 515 everyday no matter what! whch will be a problem cause i usually do not get off til 6 or way later 3-I really do not feel comfortable leaving a newborn with someone else for 10 or more hrs a day 4-Also my husband sometimes has a day or 2 off during the week and could keep him and I just bring him when he has work. 5-Maybe we could just do a trial and see how it works out Now I will find out tonight what they have talked about.. I have been waiting for over a month for an answer! They have been very unprofessional about this! To me it feels like they are telling me that its ok to raise their kids but i cant raise mine!!!! work schedule get to work, wake up kids, baths, breakfast, get them ready for school, take to school, pick up one form school , eat lunch, nap time, wake up, play, pick up other kid, look over hw, baths, sometimes dinner and bed, I do this everyday but weekends! My questions is what what everyone think about this? If they say no what should I do? Should I quit? Thing about that is i would feel bad about leaving the kids their parents are always gone. I dont know what to do!!! =(

answers (9)

I think that you need to do what seems right to you.. can you afford to just quit? I mean you have to weigh all the options if you usually work later hours then your hours would be cut back if you have to put your son in daycare then you will also have to pay daycare costs for your son as well on top of the cut hours. And daycare sure isnt cheap atleast where we live it isnt =) But it would be better then nothing if you couldnt afford to out right quit. I think that this comes down to what you think is right for you and your family. I personally couldnt leave my newborn with a stranger for that long.. I have trouble leaving her with other people.. other then the few that she has always spent time with.. and she is now 15 months old.. It is definitly something that you need to consider since you dont have that much longer until your son gets here and i am sure that you would want to put in notice if you decided to quit.. good luck and go with what you think is best.. =)
No I really can not afford to quit, since we just bought a house and now having bentley plus just had a wedding not to long ago.  =(  thing is my friend is the infant teacher at the daycare that i would go to and i use to work there.. so thats one good thing.  I guess i will find out tonight about everything hoping it goes in my favor! thanks by the way =)
if you can afford to quit then you should because your baby is alot more immportant then your job so it depends on your money situation
Can you get on with your friend who works at the daycare?  That may be more ideal to your situation.  I agree with your thought that if you are good enough to raise their kids they should trust you to raise your own while there too.  But...and I would NOT feel this way, some people and I think they may be this way feel like they are paying you to raise their children and pay attention to their children.  They don't want to pay you money while you raise your kid too.  I think that parents who aren't involved enough to get their own children up for school or tuck them in at night aren't parents enough to tell someone else how to raise their child.  I know you need the money, we were there and it gets better and I know you care for the children that you watch over, but really I don't think this situation is going to have happy results.  From the first time you posted about it I could tell what kind of parents and employers they were.  They don't care enough to be there for their own children and aren't going to care for you enough to be accomodating to your needs either.  I would say, start looking for another job now!!!  I know you will need to go out on maternity leave, but start lining up prospects now!  This is probably not going to end the way you want it to with the parents and you and your hubby need to look out for #1 priority...YOUR family.  They will find another nanny and probably make her sign a contract to not get pregnant while employed with them (they sound that demanding). 
And I'm not saying that parents who aren't there all the time with there kids are bad parents!!!  Not at all.  Both my husband and I work full time everyday.  He even works a lot of nights and weekends after being at work all day.  You do what you have to do to make a living and support your family!!!  What I am saying is there kids don't seem to be a priority at all based on your schedule.  There is not parent and kid time!  I just didn't want the other mommmy's to think I was knocking parents that work - I AM PROUD TO SAY I AM ONE!  And I love my kids and am there for them as much as I can be.  I just don't think the parents she works for feel the same way.  Just wanted to clarify.  :)
if i were u i would find a different job, put the baby in daycare until u find a new one. thats what i would do.. dont take this the wrong way at all please but i would feel bad if i had to put my own child in daycare for most of the day to raise someone elses kids for my line of work..ya know? so if they say u cant bring him to work thats what i would it will be hard taking care of ur newborn that u want to spend the most time with but u are taking care of other children at the same time..esp if u plan to breastfeed..i hope everything works out and u all come to an understanding..
I completely agree with lissiemel. They don't seem to be interested in anyones conveinence but their own. The kids have you to take care of everything and they don't care that you're fixing to have a baby and don't want to be away from him. I totally don't think they will be understanding about this either. I think they put you off for a month so it would seem like they cared but it will come right back to they don't want you to bring your son with you. I can kind of understand not wanting to pay you to raise your kid while you are raising theirs but I think it's unreasonable. I agree that you should start looking for a job now and when you go on maternity leave tell them you aren't coming back after you have your son if the tell you not to bring him with you. I really do hope I'm wrong and they turn out to be very nice and understanding people. It really doesn't seem that way though and I thought you should be prepared. Best of luck sweetie. :)
Thanks everyone! =) they have agreed to let us do a trail period and see how everything works out. As long as I get all my cleaning done everyday and watch all 3 kids I should be fine.. I dont see a problem I know I can do it. Since ive worked in daycare since I was 17 taking care of several kids at once of all different ages It doesnt bother me at all... Just happy I can bring him! Now I can stop stressing over that and worry just about moving into the house lol.. again thanks everyone =)
I'm in shock!!!  I can't believe they put aside their own needs, but yea for you!!!  Congrats and good luck!  Hopefully everything will go smoothly.  :)

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