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2.5 year old learning at day care issues

8 answers
When talking to day care lady today she tells me son isn't learning as quickly as the others as he is distracted and doesn't pay as much attention as the others. She says he knows the things she is teaching, but is too stubborn at time to want to do what she is asking. I asked for assistance on how to help him with this, and she offered nothing. I want him to succeed as much as possible. Part of me says it is his age (what 2 year old will sit for 20 minutes circling the shapes?) but she seems very frustrated with him, but is not offering anything to help me. He listens for the most part at home and I have few discipline issues overall. Any help would be appreciated.

answers (8)

How long has he been in day care? If it's new to him he may just be having a little trouble adjusting. Or, if there is something that is causing some stress in his life he may be acting out a little at day care. If there's nothing specific that is bothering him he may simply not enjoy that day care or the teacher.
He's been there since he was 3 months.  Another thing is that he is mainly potty trained for last 6 mos.  We have had very few issues at home with accidents (typically only if he sleeps in), but @ school he had 3 in the last 2 weeks.   
I was once a preschool teacher for two year olds and I have to say I never even thought of telling a parent that. To compare a two year olds learning to another two year old is honestly the craziest thing I have ever heard. All kids develop at their own stages, they also learn their own ways. Group time in our class was 10 minutes max and we always had a wiggle activity or song to sing.. maybe the problem is the teacher not the child. Ask her the things she is expecting him to learn and work with him on your own with him. For shapes find puzzles for toddlers and when he finds the shape remind him what it is called. He will have it no time. If hes more of an outdoorsy kind of boy use chalk and have him hop to each shape.  
I'm with KayKay - this sounds like more of a problem with the teacher, not the child.  I know you said your son has been there since he was three months old, and it might have been fine for him then, but it sounds as if this teacher has preconceived notions for what a 2-year-old should be doing, and since your son doesn't fit those ideas (for whatever reason), she's automatically classified him as "slow".  Which is ridiculous, because I'm with you - what two year old is going to sit for 20 minutes to circle shapes?  Jeez!  What kind of daycare is this?  Is this woman operating out of her own home, or is she part of a larger established business?  If it's the latter, I'd make an appointment with her supervisor to discuss your concerns and find out if the school director can offer you more insight into what's going on.  If it's the former, though, there's really not that much you can do.  She might have all the right certifications from the state to run a day care, but she's clearly not able to deal with kids who deviate from what she perceives to be the norm. It sounds as if your son is doing great at  home, and not so great at the day care.  If things don't improve or aren't to your satisfaction, I'd find another day care. 
I agree. Sounds like this teacher does not have realistic expectations and is not creating a positive environment for your son. She may even be stressing him out and causing the accidents he's having at day care. I'd get him out asap.
My daughter is 2 1/2 and she is the same way. She point and say almost all her ABC's but sometimes if I ask her and we try to work on it she just wont. She will act silly and just say random letters. I know then not to push it. I try to make it fun. Right now she likes to "show" he baby brother the letters and tell him what they are.  Same with colors she will be playing and pick some thing up and be like "blue cow" (or whatever) and she is correct but if I ask her can you find the blue cow, she might or might not. If I ask her what color a cup or shirt is she just says any color. I think it is the age because my friends son who is the same age does the same thing.
There's a reason there is a difference between day care and preschool and why preschool doesn't generally start until age 3. Younger kids just can't sit still or focus on anything for too long. If this day care is too structured for your son, or if this provider isn't willing to adapt activities to meet your son's needs (which sound completely normal) you might want to look into other day cares facilities. 
Unless he's in preschool where he's supposed to be focused and learning, I don't think his behavior is a big deal. It sounds normal to me.

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