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Advice on potty training my now 4 year old

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We are so frustrated at this point. We started at 18 months, so for the past 2 1/2 years we have been trying. My son potty's in the toilet just fine. He however refuses to poop in toilet. We have tried a million different methods: incentives, consequences, games, videos, books, schedules, etc. We have even gone to see a doctor to make sure there wasnt anything wrong with his internal system. When we ask him why he doesnt use toilet, the answer is always different. Our last option is to just take stuff away and NOT give it back, at all. Im not a fan of making my children miserable to prove a point, but I have no other options I can see. Someone please help me with this!! I feel like such a failure, I dont know what went wrong. HIs older sister was totally potty trained by 2 years. I dont know what to do.

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