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Facebook

4 answers
My daughter wants a facebook. I have one my husband has one so she wants one. she is 12 now but going to be 13 on saturday. should i make her one and then give it to her on her birthday or just not let her get one?

answers (4)

She's 13... If she wants one, better you let her have it. Just make sure you're able to monitor what she does and who she interacts with online... And teach her about online safety!
I am an educational psychologist, consultant and writer. Here is a link to an article I wrote on this topic:http://www.funderstanding.com/content/kids-social-media-use-and-cyberbullying-the-role-of-parents@font-face { font-family: "Cambria"; }p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal { margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman"; }div.Section1 { page: Section1; } I feel there is no set age at which I believe teenagers are ready for FaceBook (other than that I consider it completely inappropriate in elementary and middle school) because they all mature at different rates and have greater or lesser levels of parent guidance and supervision regarding their technology use, and, just as important, their social behavior. Unfortunately, FaceBook access has become integral to kids’ social status among peers. I believe that the best approach involves three fundamental conditions being set forth by parents.   First, it does not hurt kids to wait a while for something they really want, and to have to prove in some way that they are ready for it. Once a child expresses interest in having a FaceBook account, it is ok for parents to negotiate the when’s and the how’s of this privilege. It need not be bestowed immediately.   Second, a non-negotiable condition of getting a FaceBook account for any minor child should be that they allow you as the parent to be their “friend.” Kids will argue that it’s a violation of their privacy, and the comeback to that is easy: Your child’s safety and wellbeing are your responsibility, and FaceBook can be a powerful tool for undermining your ability to protect your child from harm. If your children are planning to act maturely and appropriately on FaceBook, there is nothing they should need to hide from you while they are still minors under your roof. I know many parents who are FaceBook friends with their teenagers, including myself, and it works out fine.   Third, the privilege of a FaceBook account should be accompanied by an explicit, pull-no-punches discussion about the Golden Rule. Your child should understand unequivocally that the privilege can and will be revoked at any time if it is discovered that he or she uses FaceBook to hurt other children. And if that happens, follow through immediately!   On a personal note, my child was always the last among her friends to be allowed to venture into new technologies…the last preschooler allowed to watch t.v. and videos, last to get email, last to get a cell phone, and last to get FaceBook. Her world did not collapse. Now, at 19, she thanks me for it.  Lori Daywww.loridayconsulting.com 
thank you so much!!!
First off be glad your kid is letting you know she wants one which means you are still in the driverseat. I'm not going to lie i went behind my parents back when i was younger and made a myspace. Not that my mom every really told me no or yes on the subject she just kept saying how stupid and childish it was to want something like that everytime see seen an ad or artical in the news about it. But i wanted one cause everyone at school had one and would laugh and joke about some post and i was horribly left out. I never let on to not having one for a bit just so i wouldn't be made fun of but when someone asked me why they couldn't find me on there i rushed to the library and created one right away. When my mom found out she freaked but at the same time understood. She sat me down and gave me some rules to go by and talked to me about the negative side of me as well. That's one credit i will always give to my mom no matter what she always told me the truth whether i wanted to hear it or not. She told me about the predators and weirdos out there. And in the end it helped i listened to her when someone i didn't know asked to be my friend and said we should hang out. I deleted it. Two weeks later i found out that guy ended up killing two girls a few towns over from us. So yes there is good and bad things about something like myspace or facebook but trust me kids do listen to what you say regardless if it seems like it or not.  

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