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Help my 3 1/2 yr old daughter wont poo poo in the potty

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Plz help me!!!! Im a 20 yr old mom of 2 & my oldest child is 3 1/2 yrs old she will be 4 in dec & i cant get her to go poo poo in the potty. I have tried everything including rewarding her when she does good to puttin her in time out when she has accidents. Its not a typical accident tho because she just refuses to go potty she will go pee pee just fine but when it comes to poo pooing she goes & hides & does it in her panties. My husband & i have done everything we can think of & nothing has worked :( we have even tried puttin her in a cold shower to wash her off & it doesnt seem to have any effect on her. Ive asked the dr & he says to keep tryin that she will get it but as a young mom of 2 im beginning to get frustrated. It wouldnt b so bad but she knows when she has to go she just refuses to go to the potty. Ive tried everything...plz help!!!!

answers (5)

I would love to know a solution to this one too.  Im in the exact same place and im truly running out of patence for it!
I wish I had an easy answer for you.  I went through this with my younger son who is now 8yrs old.  It took years to get him to what we call "normal."  It started with not wanting to go at all in the little potty - got rid of that right away and got him one of the seats that sit on the regular toilet.  Solved the potty part and he would occasionally, if I made him sit there, poo there too.  It took quite awhile to realize it wasn't so much that he was afaid to go but more that he was too busy and didn't want to take the time when he did have to go.  Then either it became an emergency and he would hide or it was too hard to come out.  Over time and a regular schedule of when he was going to sit there whether or not he had to go, as well plainly explaining to him that "we would wait, he won't miss anything" and "it will take longer and it will hurt if he doesn't go now" we got on the right track.  It was a long hard road that we really didn't see come to a complete end until he was probably 6 1/2, maybe 7.  He was doing great and relapsed into waiting too long andhaving marks in his undies.  At that point he was old enough he got the hint when after several warnings and talks I started throwing them away if they were "dirty."  One day he said "mom, I only have 2 pairs of underwear" and I said "yep, guess you better remember to go when you need to."  Haven't had a problem since!That said, patience, consistency and a clear plan whatever that may be will help but you have to keep at it.  Be willing to stick to your decisions if it involves punishment.  But please, don't use cold showers or physical consequences.  Personally I am not an advocate of spanking as a form of regular discipline.  That's a personal choice, but at that age it is hard for them to relate the two, it is easy to confuse them.  Make the consequence directly related to the problem behavior.GOOD LUCK!
Ughhh! potty training the thing im not looking forward to the most. But i think if you feed them prunes when they got to go they willl.
I just went through this with my almost 3 year old daughter! It was driving us crazy! Don't punish her or going in her pants, it won't help anything. We were resigned to letting her figure it out at her own pace. The problem for her was that she wasn't comfortable having to work at pooping on the toilet because it wasn't as comfortable as whatever she did when she hid to poop in her pants. Finally, like magic, we found a reward that worked and she now loves going on the potty. We had tried stickers, individual Skittles and those both worked for getting her to pee. But the only thing that worked for pooping was a lollipop. She needed something a little bigger, something more special for pooping. We got her a bag of DumDums and she hasn't had an accident since.So...try to figure out a reward that she thinks is really special. We figured out lollipops for our daughter because she always talked about the lollipops on her Hello Kitty shirt. Getting something "extra special" will make it worth the work of sitting on the potty to poop.
Thanks everyone for all your help!

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