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How to to talk about death to a 1 yr and a 12 yr?

4 answers
My daughter Kayla was born 2 month's early aswell as her twin sister Angel. Kayla is VERY sick right now and we don't think she'll survive the months to come. As much as i hate to think of her passing, i want to prepare my kids and have them understand really how sick she is and that her time here is pretty limited at the moment. My 12 year old DD is very sensitive and cry's very easily. She already has an anxiety disorder and i don't want to worry her, i just want her to know. And im really not sure how to explain it to a 1 year old (well, he is turning one tomorrow). And i now he will be confused if we stop visiting Kayla. And advice. As a mother i am so scared right now of losing my little girl. I'm also afraid of crying when i tell them, it might worry them more.

answers (4)

And advice? why ddi i write that O.o I meant "i need advice" sorry for the confusion, if there was any... lol
I'm not sure what to say to your son... But i do know what yuou could tell your daughter. First of all though, wait until your positive that she's not gonna make it. And here's what you could say: Tell her that Kayla is really hurting right now and that God is probably gonna take her up to be in heaven with him. tell her that Kayla won't be truly "dead" (you might want to use a different word, dead jsut sounds harsh) because she'll live on in our hearts, also tell her it's okay to be sad, because you are to, and that it's also aokay to cry. I'm so sorry for you by the way and im wishing you the best :)
If your older daughter has an anxiety disorder I would speak to a therapist about how to handle the situation before saying much to her. As far as your son goes, there's not much you can say to a child that little. They just don't have the ability to understand abstract concepts like death. At this point though, I would take more of a wait and see approach. There's no need to worry your children if things are just "iffy". You never know how things will work out. Miracles happen all the time.
My grandmother died when my son bryer was 3 years old so I had to explain to him when he asked where his memaw was. I sat him down and told him that when you get really old like memaw then god needs you and you go to heaven to be an angel and thats what memaw did. Then like any child he asked if we would be able to still see her, so I said that he wouldn't see her untill he went to heaven.  I think it's an easy way to say it, but as V said they can't fully understand things like that anyways so it's not something you should mention unless it happens.

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