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How to tell my family I'm weaning at 1 week?
BEFORE ANYONE ASKS: yes, I know breast is best. I had an interest in breastfeeding, but I am not against formula in the least. as a matter of fact, I prefer it for myself simply because I am not miserable at feedings and I don't resent the moment my baby becomes hungry. I believe that a happy mother who bottle feeds will be much better for the child than a sad, angry mother who is struggling to breastfeed or pump and hating every moment of it. I began breastfeeding my son as soon as he was born, but due to problems with him latching on, I have since been pumping exclusively for the last 2 days. However, I want to switch him to formula. I simply don't have the energy to keep up with his feedings and take care of myself and my two year old daughter as well. (Also, when my daughter was born, we had the same issues, but the hospital that she was born at began giving her formula and made it even harder to stick with breastfeeding. This was the main cause of my lingering PPD. After a month of struggling to breastfeed, manual pumping, and supplementing with formula, we went to exclusive formula, and I became a much happier and better mother.) However, my issue is, I want to wean my son at 1 week. While I was pregnant I was very optimistic, and told me family that I really wanted to try breastfeeding again. Over the last week, however, I have made the same decision that I made with my daughter: I simply want to formula feed. I have been having terrible PPD, and both my mother and MIL have told me that they will support me with whatever I choose to do. My husband, however, wanted me to breastfeed exclusively for at least a month, if not more. While I do prefer bottle-feeding, I feel a little guilty for giving up at 1 week after having said I wanted to try again. How do I make myself feel better about my choice and how do I got my husband and other family members to be okay with it? I don't really want to be rude to my husband, but it's not his body being taken over and his sleep being lost, it's mine. Because of this, I feel like the choice should be mine, and no one should be upset with my choice. How do I make him understand this?
Breastfeeding should be your choice, and you should'nt feel guilty, you have given what sounds like an honest try and are just not happy, that isn't your fault. BF and taking care of a toddler is so difficult it seems impossible for any one without adding on the lactation issues. Sit him down and explain why you feel like you can't continue, and tell him how important it is to you to have his support. I'm sure he will get used to the idea. When ever you feel guilty remind your self that a happy mom is a better mom, and millions of moms formula feed and have perfectly happy, healthy babies just like yours will be!
don't feel bad for not wanting to breastfeed. i knew when i was pregnant with my daughter, i did not want to do it. i tried to pump after we came home from the hospital, and was in such pain, i just gave up. i continued to give her formula, and she was just fine. yeah, breast is best, from what i hear, but it's a matter of choice. tell the rest of the family to f off. your the one dealing with a newborn and toddler. as for the husband, if he gives you hell, then tell him to shut the hell up. he's not the one who had to carry the children, or give birth. and he's not the one having to step in as the all night walking buffet, either. in no way does this make you a bad mother. breastfeeding is not for everyone.
I agree...it's your boobies so it should be your choice! I breastfed my daughter after she was born for 6 months...until she bit me (lol)...but I wasn't working and she was my only child at the time. When my son was born she was 3 1/2 yrs old and I was working nearly 40 hours a week. It was hard to maintain a schedule of pumping and feeding so I only breastfed him for 3 months...and that wasn't exclusively. The bottom line is that you are a busy mama and even though your new baby is both you and your husbands, you shouldn't feel guilt or apprehension about your decision. I think it's wonderful your MIL and mom are supportive of whatever decision you make. Maybe they would be willing to be with you while you explain your reasoning to your husband? Moral support always helps! :)And hey, if he still chides you about it, go and buy some fake boobies or stuff a bra (be sure to add some rocks or something for weight...lol) and ask him to walk a few days in your shoes. So, everytime baby needs a bottle he needs to put the bra on and feed the baby...if it's time to pump, he needs to sit down with the bra on and not move for 20 minutes. Heck, twist and pull his nipples for added effect! HAHA! My guess is he won't be so un-supportive after a few days of that!Good luck mommy... :)
great idea with the bra, hillaryathome. you could also purchase a preggo belly with giant boobies. you slip it on over your shoulders. buy him one, and on his days off, make him wear it. show him what it's like to have gigantic heavy breasts, and a huge belly to carry around all day. that will put him in his place very quickly.