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Husband on 3rd's & 4 yr. old at home, how can we have sex?
My husband is the bread winner and works 3rd shift. He sleeps from 3 p.m. - 9p.m; goes to work, get's home around 8 a.m. Either he sleeps for a couple of hours in the a.m. and if he doesn't, the 4 yr. old is up. How is it possible to get or give any sexual attention? My husband is about to leave my marriage, as he says it is my job to figure something out. Daycare is not in the budget, any suggestions would be helpful.
It's not your job, it's BOTH of your jobs to figure it out. That said: 1. babysitter2. have him wake up an hour earlier, after the 4-year-old's bedtime3. trade time with another mom - she watches your kid so you can get some, and then you watch hers so she can do what she likes for the same amount of time4. videos (for your son, not yourselves, although hey, whatever you like) "Sit here, son, and watch Bert & Ernie, and don't move from that spot for the next 30 minutes."
I would let them either play in their room or in the living room with cartoons. Maybe just do quickies at first until you are comfortable that your house will still be standing when you get done. Or have a neighbor, friend, family member watch them for a bit. Babysitters are also relatively cheap. Or why not just do something on his days off?
I agree with the above posters. Also, though, why is it exclusively your job to figure this out? it's his schedule that is making it difficult. What is his suggestion? I think it is selfish of him to threaten to leave you unless you figure out when you both can have sex with each other.
While it sounds like there is something deeper rooted here that you guys need to figure out..... Take advantage of those days off! My husband works 3rds as well, and he has one or two perfectly good days off every weekend that our son is in bed and we have a few hours before I go to sleep. It sucks having to have a schedule for that sort of thing, but spontanaeity kind of goes out the window when you become parents.