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My 4 yr old has slept in my bed since she was born. How do i fix this

3 answers
My 4 year old daughter has slept in my bed since she was born. We have tried numerous things and we always end up going back to letting her sleep with us. Its frustrating because we have no alone time together at all. She is very obsessed with me (her mom) and doesn't like to be away from me at all. So with my crazy hours that i work sleeping is where she has contact with me the most some weeks. Her dad will get her to sleep in her bed while i work 3-11pm but she fakes sleeping until 11:30 when i try to creep in the house and she pops right up and says "mommy your home". I try to get her to go back to sleep in there and I've only succeed maybe twice. So she will end up coming into my bed around 12:30,1. Because i don't want her staying up any later crying and waking up our neighbors (because we live in an apartment building) and sometimes i have to be back to work early in the morning! I NEED HELP PLEASE!! I need help getting her to fall asleep alone in her bed and staying in her bed all night!!! Because when i laid with her until she fell asleep i would always end up falling asleep with her in her bed until morning! We even bought her a twin bed with memory foam for more room and comfort for her! She has night lights, a radio, a fan etc. PLEASE HELP!

answers (3)

My mom had this problem with my sister. She was just a snuggly little kid. she was also very afraid of the dark. She didn't even like being in a different room of the house. When she was about five, my mom put a sleeping bag on the floor right next to the bed and she would sleep there. Sometimes she would end up back in bed with my parents and sometimes she would sleep all night on the floor. It gave my parents a little more room, but not much privacy.
the reason that you are having such a hard time, is because you allowed this behavior to start in the first place. they make cribs for a reason, woman! put you kid in a bed! tell her to stay there. she continues to push the issue because you continue to give in.  you need to put your foot down. you are teaching your child that once she whines and cries long enough to get what she wants, you will give it to her. this will lead to defiance. sounds like it already has. as for the neighbors, tell them to f off and get some ear plugs. show them the national bird.
The longer it continues the harder it will be. At some point as hard as it is she will give in and get used to the fact that you are not sleeping with her. If your concerned she feels she isn't getting enough time with you set aside special time with her. Maybe waking her up in the morning and cooking a special breakfast together or going out to breakfast. When my youngest daughter was born my then 2 year old started becoming very clingy, so once a week I would leave the baby home with my boyfriend and take her on a girls trip to get sushi or walk on the beach. giving your daughter a little one on one time may help her feel better about spending the night away from you. If you stick to your guns and don't allow her to come in you will get the point across. You may have a few sleepless nights but it will pay off sooner.

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