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My boyfriend wants to be the only one in the room during the birth..

8 answers
My mother, sister, and boyfriend's mother are planning on coming down for the birth of my first child. When I told him this he immediatly began complaining that it would be too "crowded" in the room and that if he could have it his way he'd be the only one in the room besides the staff. I want my mother there (what daughter wouldn't at that time?) and I would also like my sister to be with me. After telling him this he said that if they got in the way or caused any unnecessary stress he would tell them to leave. I cannot imagine having to deal with a boyfriend on a power trip trying to kick my own family out during this time and it worries me. I don't want to make him feel insignificant, like he has no say, but this is very frustrating. What do I do?

answers (8)

He has good reasons for not wanting others in the room. After all, this is his child and not theirs. As the due date nears, sit him down again and tell him what the birth plan is. Tell him, if YOU feel too overwhelmed that YOU will be the one kicking people out, NOT him.
if you want your family in there then let them in its your choice he doesnt have to have a baby
Ultimately, it's your choice - but I do agree with him on one point: if your mother and sister are doing more harm to you than good, then yeah, they need to leave the room - but it should be YOUR call, not his.  Keep in mind, too - your opinion on who you want in the room may change once you're in there yourself.  It's great to start out with your sister and mother, but if you get in the middle of labor and decide you want EVERYONE out - well, then kick 'em out.  Don't feel as though you have to have them there, because at one time you thought it was a good idea!
Maybe if you are willing to meet him half way, let them be in the room until it is time to start pushing.It allows them to be around, but also gives you the family time he wants. Once the baby is out and cleaned up you can invite your Mom and sister back in and introduce the newest family member with your boyfriend.If you aren't open to that, explain to him that he is very important, but while you are in labor you need to do what makes you comfortable. Spell out why you want your family there for you, and tell him you really hope that he understands.
We all know what it's like to give birth and to want the extra support of loved ones in the room, however I think you need to think of your boyfriends feelings as well.The birth of a baby is a very special time between a mom and dad. It may not only be about the fact that he doesn't want too many people in the room, maybe he doesn't want to hurt your feelings, and maybe he want's to share this speacial momet privately and with just you. I'm not saying you should ban your family from the hospital, I brought my family in the room after I gave birth. Maybe you should do the same after you and your boyfriend have already shared the birth of your baby.I had my husband and my best friend in the room when I gave birth. However, if my husband wanted it to be just the two of us, that's how it would have been.
I know I want just my fiance and I in the room, and he is going with the flow on it, thank goodness. You just have to sit him down and tell him how you feel and that you would like to make a compromise. And If things do change where your mom is getting to bossy or your sister all of a sudden is the labor guru and is telling you how to do EVERYTHING, kick them out. Labor isn't supposed to be easy, but you can make it as stress free as possible. 
They all say this and if It's his first baby. Let me be honest he will call in your mom, so don't worry be blessed. Men can be a little scrary too.Today is the season premiere of Teen Mom. Will you be watching? Check out our list of best & worst Teen Mom moments: mommy things
I allowed my mom and dad, and my boyfriend's mom and dad to be in the room while I labored. As soon as it was time to push, it was just me and him. This was perfect for us, and my mom was ok with it. If my mom would have asked to stay in the room, I would have let her even though my boyfriend wanted it to be just us. As he said, we made the baby alone together and we should be the first two people to welcome her into the world.

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