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My boyfriends son
His son lives with his mother who lives with my boyfriends mom. The spoil him rotten. He eats in front of the tv. If he don't like something he's given they give him something else. He plays on an iPad all day and the list goes on. I have a 4 year old daughter of my own that comes every other weekend. His son comes every weekend. I pick him up drop him off and care for him. He is rude and treats me poorly. He has hit me and kicked me. He cries at every meal and says he doesn't want to come over because we don't have an iPad. We have strict rules like; all meals must be finished. We do chores and work on educational things. He's in pre school and can't say any abc or count or write his name. My daughter can do all of that and she's not in school. I'm just confused and frustrated I guess. I treat both children the same but I'm so frustrated with how much he whines and cries! Please help.
Be strict! that's all I can say. You need to set your rules and your boyfriend should respect you for your decisions. I in some ways I had the same problem with my son. We lived with my grandparents for a few years and of course they spoiled him and let him do whatever he wanted and, when we moved out and were on our own he would go spend the night there occasionally. He thought he could do the same thing when he came home. For a while he very much disliked me but I had to stick to my plan. He wanted to eat junk food all the time didn't want to eat what I cooked didn't want to go to bed on time. He was told to eat the food that was put in front of him and, if not then he went to bed with nothing to eat. That sounds mean but eventually he was tired of going to bed hungry and started eating what was put in front of him. As for him being rude and disrespectful that one is on you. You need to be firm and let him know that when he hits, kicks or, is being rude to you that it is unacceptable and consequences come with that kind of behavior and you need to stick to it and don't let up because if you do he wont take you serious. My boyfriend was in the same situation with my son and was soft hearted and didn't stay with his plan and my son walked all over him until he finally had enough and got his stuff together. For a while though you will be the bad person...it's not an easy process but eventually the child will respect you for everything you do