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She wont talk about it!

2 answers
My four year old step daughter is many times the life of the room, that is until you ask her anything about her mom. We have split custody till she starts school in the fall, and at that time she will live with us and mom will have her every other weekend. The problem is when we pick Morgan us from her visits she refuses to tell us anything about what she did or where she went, and usually starts putting her hands in her mouth, and sometimes starts crying. We know her mother tells her to tell us nothing but she wont even tell us what she ate or who she played with. I think this is wierd considering she is four, and is a little chatter box. We are worried that something is going on that we need to know about. If anyone has any ideas on how to get her to open up or if this is normal please let me know, cause its really starting to scare us! Thanks Ashley!

answers (2)

If you really think there is something bad going on, you may need to take her to a child's counselor to get her to open up about it.  It may sound out there, but that's her mother and who knows what she's told that little girl.  It could be anything from if you tell I won't love you anymore to someone will take you away.  Try not to pressure her and she may let stuff slip on her own, I know our 5 year old does.  If like I said if you are really concerned then you may need to get a neutral party involved, someone that she would see as an adult, but more a doctor whose job it is to make it better.  Good luck.
Because of the nature of your situation, you really don't know the natural's mother's friends, boyfriends, others in the house. It may be time to have the talk about "good touches and bad touches". Blood is thicker than water and this little girl wants nothing more than the love and acceptance of her birth mother. Sometimes children believe the divorce or her parents break up was their fault. They will do just about anything to secure the love of their parents to counter their feelings. You have no way of knowing what her mom said, nor can you. You will have to respect and accept that. But, you do need to ensure this child is at a safe place when she is with her mother. Start the difficult dialog today in a loving, comforting atmosphere. Let her know you will be there to love, help, and guide her if anything happens that makes her uncomfortable. Don't underestimate the tug-of-war for loyalty and acceptance going on inside your step daughter's heart over this situation.

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