i had the same problem with my 21 month old daughter. she demanded to be potty trained twice. she took a parents guide to potty training, went to the bathroom, and told me to sit on the big potty. she took off her pants and diaper, and sat on her potty. she hands me this guide, and says, "here mama. you read now! you teach me!" as she opened up the book, and turned the pages for me. so i thought, ok this will be easy! oh boy, was i wrong. we took her potty out of the picture, and bought an $8 plastic seat that fits over our existing toilet seat. it's a tantrum every single time she sits on it, but i'm 9 weeks pregnant as of monday, and i'm not having 2 in diapers, unless i'm having twins. i know she can do it, because she has managed to pee on the potty over 20 times. my sister in law told me to just make her do it. so i make her sit on the potty for atleast 3 minutes, and tell her she doesn't have to do anything, but she does have to try. i just put my hands on her legs, and make her sit. i know that sounds cruel, but it has worked so far. it's been a nightmare, but she's close to being fully trained in the day time. i never used pull ups. they are too much like diapers. i put her in cotton underwear, and let her pee and poop on herself, so she get's the idea that this is an uncomfortable feeling. she hates it when pee runs down her leg, and runs to the bathroom, banging on the door. i don't spank her or put her in time-out for accidents, i just say, "you peed/pooped in your big girl panties! let's clean you up. next time, you need to try and make it to the potty. after trying to tell her "you had an accident, that's ok.", she had this notion that she could pee and poop in her pants, and it was still ok, because mom would clean her up. she just gave up on trying after that. so i have resorted to other options. i hope this helps. potty training is a nightmare.