You are here

Get Answers

Sometimes it's nice to get advice from experts with a lot of letter degrees behind their names, but other times, you just need to hear what another parent (with a M.O.M. behind her name) has done that has worked. You've got questions? These moms have answers.

when is it safe to tell family your expecting?

4 answers
Hi I am 5weeks pregnant with my third child. My fiance wants to tell everyone. I already told a few close friends. I keep hearing I should wait till im 3months and announce it. Its driving me nuts! I didnt think about this for my first or second child I just said it : ) But now im 27 I was younger when i had my first two. Also My mother and i dont get along and when she finds out she will def be upset...She really just doesnt want me to be happy. Ive tried to be the bigger person but she just critizes me at all times. and said if my fiance and i have a baby she will not want anything to do with our child. So im just worried i guess she will wish bad upon our child and i just dont need the added stress right now i guess thats another reason why im confused if i should announce now or wait a bit... So please any suggestions " Can I announce or should I wait a lil longer ?

answers (4)

While many women choose to wait until they are safely past the 12-week mark when the risk of miscarriage decreases, other women don't wait because they know they would need support if they lost the baby. Some women who wait to tell and then miscarry regret their decision, feeling like the baby was never "real" to anyone else and was gone before anyone could share in their happiness. Other women do not want their friends and relatives to know if they miscarry, or to "ride the roller coaster" of hope and disappointment with them if they have a history of miscarriage. It comes down to an individual decision--there is no right answer. It took me 4 years of IVF to conceive, and I knew it was going to be a high-risk pregnancy, but I told everyone my news as soon as I knew it--when I had barely missed my period. Fortunately, I carried to term and delivered a healthy baby girl, my only child. Had I miscarried, I would not have regretted telling the people close to me of my pregnancy--I would have really needed their support if I'd lost the baby it took me four years to conceive! Lori DayEducational Psychologist and
i told my family as soon as i found out but in your situation i think its totally up to you and what you think would be better and easier on you and your husband and your kids
I agree with Lori, you should let people know so you can have support in celebrating the good news.  If there are issues with your mother not accepting the child, it doesn't matter when you tell her - now, or waiting - that will change her reaction.  It might just make you feel better to get it off your chest and then you can focus on taking care of yourself, the baby and your other children.  It will save you the stress of thinking about it and worrying about it. Good luck!
Thank you ladies for all the great advice! I def agree with it all. I also agree with the comment Ambera17 made"it doesnt matter when you tell her - now,or waiting- that will change her reaction" Once its announced I can move onn with the hubby and kids & wait for baby # 3 hoping and praying all goes well ... Thank you again for the best wishes and taking the time to give some advice..Good Luck gals in all that you do!

*DISCLAIMER's Answers are provided by members of our community. While your fellow moms and our editors have plenty of great advice to offer based on their experience, it is not a substitute for professional medical help. Always consult a medical professional when seeking medical advice. All submitted answers are subject to the rules set forth in our Privacy Policy and Terms of Use