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Wit & Wisdom: If The Shoe Fits

Q: I gave birth 6 months ago, and I'm almost back to my prepregnancy weight. (Yeah!) There's only one thing that's still big -- or maybe I should say "things": my feet. I can't fit into any of my shoes. When will my feet return to normal?

A: For some women, pregnancy results in permanently bigger feet. For example, I was married in size 8-1/2 shoes, but after having four kids (including triplets) I now wear the same size as Bozo. My cost-conscious husband points out that since I wear such big shoes, as compared to petite women, I get a lot more leather for my money. Of course, he's the same guy that when I called to tell him I'd just bought an adorable little kitten that was born without a tail, he immediately instructed me to demand a discount.

Janet Konttinen is a syndicated humor columnist with one son and triplet daughters.