Lori’s determination continues to impress me. I was prepared to launch my effort on increasing her freelance income and during our discussion this week she tells me of not one, but two job interviews she has scheduled during these next two weeks. Good work, Lori!
While either of these may provide enough income to allow us to begin to plan for her moving to her own place – a comment Lori has already made – and both could be flexible enough to allow for school, I will want to take that step only after some time in the job has passed. Not only to allow for the initial excitement of the new job to dissipate, but to build-up a cash reserve, finish paying down existing credit card debt and most importantly – not overwhelm Lori and the kids with too much change at once. As Lori pointed out herself during our conversation, she may very well find herself starting a new job and returning to school at the same time and until we have a better understanding of the time pressures and scheduling conflicts that likely will come-up, I believe Lori and her family are better off continuing to live with her mom. One step at a time, and the next one is to get Lori’s family on a much more firm financial foundation before increasing her monthly obligations with rent and utilities.
Lori also told me she did try to speak with her mom about her plans for school and the potential that has to lengthen the time she would be living at home. I have been talking with Lori about the reasons for having that conversation with her mom since we started working together and she has been reluctant to do so. She didn’t think her mom would be able to really hear her and have a real conversation – and it didn’t square with her relationship with her mom. I have continued to make the suggestion, believing an honest attempt would be empowering for Lori even if there was no connection. Lori would be making the effort, first, to have a candid, adult conversation with her mom about her plans and concerns and invite her mom to share her concerns as well. Apparently there wasn’t much conversation, but I am so glad she tried and I still believe there will be future benefits for Lori having done so.