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Shades of Pink

I ran out of sticks to pee on. We had to get up early yesterday morning to drive a few hours to a ferry that would take us to Victoria, British Columbia. But I was determined to get another ovulation kit before we set sail.

While we were driving along the beautiful coastline (think serene ocean in front of gorgeous mountains peaking out behind billowy clouds) I asked my husband to look out for drug stores.

"Maybe they'll be selling ovulation kits at the ferry stop," he said sarcastically. "Drinks, snacks, and ovulation kits."

"Ha ha. Just look for a sign for a drug store please." Then I fell asleep.

I woke up as he was turning into a Rite Aid. Yes!

I ran in and found the kits. This time I decided to get a less expensive kit — the generic Rite Aid ovulation sticks. I mean, how many $42 digital ClearBlueEasy kits can I justify going through in one cycle? This one seemed similar enough (and cheaper), so I bought it, and quickly put it to use in the drug store's bathroom. (Yes, I couldn't wait until we got to Victoria that afternoon...I wanted to know right then if I was surging.)

In the surprisingly spacious public restroom, I peed on the stick, held it as level as I could while I washed my hands, hid it in my shopping bag, and ran out of the Rite Aid back to the car. Then I took it out and put it on the floor of the front seat of the car.

"You took the test in the store?" my husband asked incredulously.

"I had to know."

ovulation sticks
Ovulation sticks — Does the line in the square look lighter than the line in the oval to you?

To my dismay, however, this kit was not like my easy-to-read digital kit. This kit required me to compare one pink line in the square to the "control" pink line in the oval. If my new pink line was lighter than the control line, then I wasn't surging. But if my new pink line was the same color — or darker — than the control line, then I WAS surging.

"Are these lines the same color?" I asked my husband as we parked in front of the ferry.

"Uh, I don't think so."

"This one's lighter than the control, right?" I asked.

"I think so."

Arg. Why didn't I get the digital kit?

So, late that night, I tested myself again in our bathroom at the hotel (after waiting to pee for four hours prior — which is what the kit says you should do for best results).

"Is it darker this time?" I asked my husband as he got ready for bed. I whipped out the stick from earlier in the day to compare.

"Yeah, it is."

"But it's still not as dark as the control, right?"

"No, it's definitely lighter than the control," he agreed. We studied the sticks…put them under the lamp on the nightstand…moved them into the bathroom for better lighting...and then compared them to the picture on the instructions.

"This is the worst kit! Who can tell?" I said.

"Do you want me to try a stick, and see if it's any different?" he asked.

"Yeah. Let's see."

I explained to him how to position the stick, I told him to hold it there for no more than 10 seconds, and I instructed him to lay the stick flat when he was done. Then we waited. One minute. Two minutes. Three mintues. Five minutes.

He wasn't surging either.

The only helpful bit of info his stick provided was that maybe his pink line was lighter than my stick's pink line. So maybe I was surging a little bit?

"This kit is terrible. Don't get this kit again," he said.

We're not going to have sex tonight because I've got to ovulate soon, right? And I don't want sex to happen too close to ovulation so that we try for a girl this one last time.