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Dating As A Single Mom: Success!

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I went on a blind date last week. It was refreshing and fun! I’ve been dating on and off since JD turned 2. Surprisingly I never get too bummed if a date doesn’t turn into another date (sometimes, I’m thrilled!). I think that’s the thing about dating as a single mom and not a single lady—you really have no time to overanalyze or stress—or wait for the phone to ring or an email to show up in your inbox (Chrissy, PRE-JD). If you’re like me, potty training (JD is 96% there!) and work is TOP priority. So, about my blind date…

My friend, Lauren, set me up with her friend D. He works at a small ad agency in NYC, but lives in NJ—ding, ding, ding! Look, I love NYC, but it’s not smart for me to date a guy who lives there. I don’t want to drive more than a half-hour into the city and not enjoy a cocktail on a date (especially first—hee, hee) because I’d have to drive home, probably late. There’s the tunnel fee, parking fee and babysitting fee to consider too. So, when Lauren told me he lived in a very cool, urban town near me, I said, “YES!” I’ll go! When, where—what’s his name again?

Since we were meeting for dinner, I decided to dress up a little. I wore a cute black skirt with pockets, a simple, semi slouchy grey t-shirt tucked in, nude peep toes and a chunky gold bracelet. Some makeup, but mostly just red lip gloss. I set JD up with his fave sitter, a brand new coloring book and Matchbox car, left money for pizza and hit the road. JD barely said, “Bye!” He was really into his planet coloring book. It made me feel good (great!) that he was happy and entertained when I left at 6:00 P.M.

A few details about the date—a few! D was cute and had surfer brown/blondish hair. I liked his outfit: Jeans, a Lacoste button-down and old-school white Adidas sneakers. He did all the right things—opened doors, let me walk ahead of him—paid! (I’m old-fashioned—it’s nice when a guy pays on the first date). We have a lot in common—he’s working on a novel, in addition to his full-time job. When he said this I wondered for a moment if I should mention the fact that I published a book. D didn’t know my last name ahead of time, so googling me was not an option (Lauren told him I was a magazine writer). He did know I had a loveable, adorable 3-year-old. I took a risk and told him about my single mom memoir, Rattled!, and threw in that it was favorably reviewed by The New York Times and named a Target Breakout Book. He was interested and I think, impressed. He asked me tons of questions (kind of reminded me of my students). My fave question: how did you write a book and take care of a newborn—at the same time, he said this, beer, midair. I smiled and answered, “Coffee.”

It was a fun date! He smelled minty--beery! We’re going out again! No more details. Sorrrrry!

Now, I have a treat for you. Check out my latest single parenting slide show, Dating Tips for Single Parents. Amy Spencer, the relationship expert who shared advice in the slide show, is the author of Meeting Your Half-Orange: An Utterly Upbeat Guide to Using Dating Optimism to Find Your Perfect Match (I read it and LOVED it! If you’re single, you MUST read this book). I have two copies to giveaway! Win one by sharing, blippity, blip, a dating disaster story. Read the giveaway rules here.

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