Since I’m fairly new to parenting.com, I wanted to bring up a controversial subject and see where you all stand. I’m talking about…abortion. This past weekend my friend, *Jane, 30 told me her friend, *Sue, 29 recently confided that she took RU-486, otherwise known as the abortion pill. Jane’s reaction was quick, and fine, she owned it, but I don’t really agree with it. Here goes…
“I mean, I basically just sat there,” Jane said. ‘What could I possibly say?”
“What do mean?” I said.
“Um, she murdered her baby! It’s gross!” Jane said. “There was a heartbeat, doesn’t that count!?”
“What did her boyfriend say?” I asked.
“It wasn’t her boyfriend. It was some random guy who she claimed she couldn’t see helping her out with the baby. But, hi, look at you! You have a baby and you’re single. It’s fine!” Jane insisted.
No, Jane, I’m NOT the poster child. My slogan isn’t, “It’s fine!” Life as a single mom worked out for me, because I had many advantages and I wanted to be a mom. But, look at Amber! She's a mess. The comparision made me feel weird. I have no idea what *Sue was going through when she decided to end her pregnancy and even though I can share my stories, I can't confirm my happy, sometimes CRAZY single mom bubble is going to be the next gal's. Choice is a beautiful thing and to have it, we as women need to stand by each other whether Pro-Choice or Pro-Life. Choice doesn't exist without options.
Me? I’m a weird breed of Pro-Choice and some could argue I’m actually Pro-Life, but too feminist to admit it. The thing is, I personally wouldn’t have an abortion, but I think every woman has a right to choose, including *Sue. I think it’s a deeply, personal matter and one that should be taken extremely seriously.
I think it’s inappropriate to have abortion parties—celebrations that help fund procedures. Yes, women are having them. I think it’s over-the-top to live tweet your abortion— yes, women are doing this. I think it's insane for people to judge women who abort out of medical necessity. (This couple chose abortion when they learned their fetus had mermaid syndrome.) Of course, you could argue it’s nutso for mommy bloggers to tweet, “My son’s poop is green—oh joy!” Or, pen blogs that chronicle every, waking moment of their pregnancy. Women who write about the joys and glitches of pregnancy and motherhood could say they are paving the way for new moms, offering advice and sharing the best and worst, but, I guess so could women who share info about their abortions. Some might consider them brave for putting such a controversial subject out there. It’s a very grey line.
I’m curious where you all stand on the abortion front. If you went into your pregnancy with your man at your side, but he left when you could still safely have an abortion, would not wanting to be a single mom sort of validate your willingness to have one? Are you someone who couldn’t have an abortion, but would accompany a friend to the procedure if she asked for your support? Let’s share!