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Need to Know

Magoo is at a stage where he just NEEDS to know. He needs to know why. He needs to know who. He thinks he knows how but he’s not sure. Yeah. He wants someone to tell him how. And don’t even get him started on where: Where are we going? Where’s Grammy right now? Where do they get the milk? Where is the more sugar?

At the same time, he’s got a lot of answers and he’s pretty sure he’s right. Pretty much all the time. He has this very wise, knowing look he gives with one eyebrow raised and his head tilted forward when he’s telling you an especially choice nugget of information that he feels will blow the jelly right out of your tarts.

In Costco the other day he scoured the store for samples like a boy whose mother never feeds him at home, calling out when he spotted a sample cart with the voice of a sailor who’s finally found land after weeks of being adrift at sea. “OH. LOOK. SAMPLES!!!!”

But the samples were sparse on this particular day and he was feeling the deprivation most keenly. A baby was wheeled by in a cart, bawling her very brains out and Magoo gave me the knowing look and shook his head. “She’s sad mom. She’s sad ‘cause there’s not much samples today.”

I think that’s called projection.

Then I went to check on him around midnight last night as I was headed to bed. He sat straight up and asked for a drink of water. I brought it to him and he said, “It’s so dork still.”

“Yep. It’s still dark. It’s because it’s the middle of the night.”

“No. I think it’s because I didn’t do enough sleeping yet.” And he rolled over and went back to sleep.

So if you’re noticing that the nights seem particularly long this winter, it’s likely because Magoo won’t stay in his flippin’ bed and get the rest he needs so the sun can rise again.

But more than the answers, he has so many questions about EVERYTHING. And he can’t always spit them out very…he doesn’t really complete…sometimes he…there’s this thing he does…and he can’t really…know…trailing off…why…or somesing.

In the car this week we had a 10-minute conversation that went approximately like this:

Magoo: Mom.
Me: Yeah.
Magoo: Mom. Renumber with that big…why can’t that guy…renumber that…Mom?
Me: Yeah.
Magoo: Renumber on that big. Mom…why can’t the big elf…mom…why if he…mom…he can’t…renumber how he can’t…why can’t…on the movie…why does he not can…mom.

This went on and on and on and on until he finally asked me why Buddy the Elf didn’t know how to use an escalator when he went to the mall in the movie Elf. I told him that Buddy had never seen an escalator before because they don’t have them at the North Pole.

“But why can’t they have…they have elevescators at the NORTH POLE!!”

“I don’t think they do.”

“Mom! They DO! Why can’t he…renumber…why can’t he…mom…in the Elf one…why can’t…”

I’m glad I still find this amusing, charming even. Check back with me in a couple of months.

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