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Part I: Overheard at the Harley Davidson dealership


William: That's a motorcycle!
Me: Yes.
William: It's cool!
Me: Yes.
William:...and pretty.
No. No, no no. No.


Part II: Overheard from the booster seat

William, upon noticing his runny nose: My nose is coming down.


Part III: Overheard at breakfast

Grace: Oh, it died.
Me: It "died"?
Grace: Yes.
Me: What died?
Grace: The butter.
Me: The butter died.
Grace: Yes. You need to put more.
Me: On top of your dead butter.
Grace: Yes.
Me: Um, Okay.


Part IV: Overheard on the couch

Me: When can I have a day when I sleep as late as I want and then do whatever I want?
My wife: In about fifteen years.
Me: Right.


Part V: Overheard from the playroom

Grace: Dad, I'm almost making a beautiful picture.


Part VI: Overheard in the yard

Grace: Oh, no! My tie came unshoed!


Part VII: Overheard while browsing photos

Me: Look at these new pictures of William
My wife: God, he's so frickin' cute.
Me: Yeah. He looks so grown up.
My wife: Don't you think he's especially good looking?
Me: Well, of course. But, I'm his father, so...
My wife: No, I mean he's really amazingly beautiful. When we're at the playground, with the ugly children...
My wife: What? I said "other children."
Me: No, you totally said "ugly children."
My wife: No, I did not.

Oh, yes she absolutely did.


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